BOLI Blog

Why my husband and I didn’t exchange gifts on our wedding day

Other ways to celebrate each other without breaking the bank.

Bridesmaids gifts? Check. Groomsmen gifts? Check. Parents gifts? Check. My soon-to-be husband’s gift? Nope.

Whether you have help paying for your wedding or you’re paying for it yourself, there’s no doubt when it comes time to buy gifts for others, you’re probably tapped out. So, why not skip the gift exchange with your future spouse? That’s what I did, and I don’t regret it for a second. Here’s why.

We shower each other with our love and presents, all the time. As I always say, ‘Isn’t my love and kisses enough?’ But in all seriousness, we wanted to save money. We know we’ll be spending the rest of our lives together, and there will be plenty of gifts. So why not take the money we would spend on gifts for each other and save it for something – a vacation, a home improvement project, a pool, kids? The list really goes on and on of things we can do with that money.

For me, I actually don’t need a physical gift for my now-husband to show me he cares. Just another reason why we both didn’t feel the need to exchange gifts on the big day. We were just happy exchanging vows and enjoying the celebration with our friends and family. Being there and saying ‘I do’ was enough for us.

We also didn’t want to stress out. Well, my husband didn’t want me to stress out. He saw how stressed I was with the planning and the purchasing of other gifts, we were literally roaming the mall a week before trying to find gifts for the bridesmaids and groomsmen. In fact, I bought our gift to his daughter the morning of our rehearsal dinner. He knew that if we had to get one more thing, it would put us over the edge as far as stress level.

But, I can understand why you would want to show your affection to your soon-to-be spouse with something physical on your big day. There are great little gifts and ideas you can do won’t cause extra stress on you or your wallet. Why not write each other a letter? Something just for each other’s eyes. Not great with words on paper? Bake them a treat a few days before. If they love your chocolate chip cookies – make a batch and leave them for him to eat while getting ready on your wedding day. Not a baker either? Take some time out a few days before and get massages or have a quiet dinner just the two of you. Reflect on what is about to happen. Or make playlists for each of you to listen to while getting ready? Songs that you love either together or separately – something to make you smile while you prepare to spend the rest of your lives together.

Whether you choose to exchange gifts with your soon-to-be spouse or you opt to save for something else, it’s important to remember the reason you are getting married. And it’s important to make sure to focus on each other that day first and foremost, and everything else will fall into place.