The day is about you, but you’ll still want to avoid the worst etiquette mistakes you can make as a couple.
One of the biggest pieces of advice we give to our brides of Long Island is this: “It’s your day, and you get to decide what’s best for you.”
While we wholeheartedly believe in that statement, you’ll still want to think about those who are coming together and making the day possible. Yes, the concept of “etiquette” certainly applies to your guests, but it applies to you and your fiancé too! There are ways that you can extend your gratitude and make the day a true celebration, and there are some mistakes you can make that will leave things on a sour note.
As you’re planning and prepping for your wedding, be sure to avoid some of the worst etiquette mistakes you can make as a couple. They may be totally unintentional, but giving some thought to them now can prevent any tension on the big day.
Image courtesy of Yellow House Images
Forgetting about your guests
This may seem like a no-brainer — of course you think about your guests, it’s not a party without them! However, there are choices you can make that may annoy or inconvenience them at best, and offend them at worst.
Think about who you are inviting. If you have some guests that are older and use mobility aids, like walkers or wheelchairs, how are they going to feel about an oceanside ceremony that’s a quarter mile away from the parking lot? If you’re inviting vegans, vegetarians, or those with other dietary restrictions, will they be hungry with no real options to choose from on your menu? If your hour-long ceremony starts at 2 but they cocktail hour doesn’t start until 7, how will your guests fill the time? And if that cocktail hour is outside in March, how will they keep warm? If you’ve skipped on plus ones but sit singles at tables with people they don’t know, how much fun will they have…especially if you only have a cash bar?
Your wedding should be a day about you and your new spouse. But if you truly don’t want to think about anyone else, eloping is the way to go.
Image courtesy of Citrine Visuals
Throwing your schedule out the window
Everyone is guilty of running late to things every now and then. Your wedding day, though? It’s crucial you stick to your schedule. Timelines are a big deal for a reason — a lot happens on your wedding day and it’s easy for things to get out of hand. Always keep an eye on the clock and keep things moving according to schedule. You’ve asked your guests to be on time for things, don’t keep them waiting.
This goes for events outside of the actual wedding, too. Be on time to your bridal shower, engagement party, bachelorette events, and rehearsal dinner.
Neglecting to appreciate to your bridal party
There’s more to being in a bridal party than dressing up and walking down an aisle. They plan (and pay for) various wedding activities, support you during the entire planning process, and take time out of their lives to celebrate you. Be sure to show them how grateful you are for their efforts! This is usually done with a gift close to the big day — jewelry, watches, clothing, or other small tokens of appreciation are appropriate.
Also, if you’re asking your girls to get ready together in the morning, feed them! You’ll have a long day ahead, and lots of hours before you’ll get the opportunity to eat. And if you’re requiring that they have their hair and makeup professionally done, it’s common courtesy to cover that cost.
Image courtesy of Studioworks Weddings
Not taking care of your vendors
Your vendors work hard to create the day of your dreams. They spend hours and hours of time on your wedding, both in preparation and on the actual day. For vendors that work your wedding events (like DJs and MCs, photographers and videographers, photo booth attendants, etc), you’ll need to make sure they’re fed during the festivities. Treat every member of your vendor team with respect — that goes for ALL vendors (and don’t forget to tip).
Forgetting to say “thank you”
Your wedding day will be a whirlwind to say the least. Between pictures, first dances, and cake cutting, you’ll seem like you’re rushing from one place to another. While you’ll definitely want to make sure you have a good time, it’s also important to thank those in attendance.
Receiving lines are an easy way to hit most of your guests at once, but if you don’t want to do one, find the time during your reception to address everyone. Going around to each table should allow you to say “thanks” to everyone there.
And once the big day has come and gone, get those thank you notes out!