BOLI Blog

Even More of the Biggest Wedding Myths – Busted

Planning a wedding? You’re bound to hear a few pieces of advice – and some of it you should totally ignore! Here are even more of the biggest wedding myths busted.

Image courtesy of Studio 27 Photography

From even bridal party numbers to recouping wedding expenses, we’ve busted a fair amount of the biggest wedding myths. But there are plenty more “words of wisdom,” often said with the best intentions, that can really wreck havoc on your bridal peace of mind. Trust us when we say that not all wedding advice is helpful – or even accurate! Here are even more of the biggest weddings myths, expertly busted by our BOLI team.

MYTH #1: Engaged? You should start “shredding for the wedding.”

Nearly every bride has heard this one (or its alternative “breading for the wedding”) – a suggestion that your body, just as it is in this moment, isn’t the right shape or size for your impending nuptials. 

We don’t have to tell anyone who’s been on the receiving end of this “advice” how it feels to hear. But we’re here to tell you the truth: you are perfect. Your body is perfect. And you will look absolutely beautiful on your wedding day – not in spite of your body, but because of it. 

Your fiancé, friends, and family love you RIGHT NOW. They love your spirit, your soul, AND your body – because your body is what holds your spirit and soul. The packaging may look different based on weight loss or gain, but what’s inside stays the same. The gift is still there regardless of the wrapping paper. 

If YOU would like to change your body before your wedding, then go for it in a healthy and mindful way. But don’t let anyone else tell you that you should, or that you have to. Remember – there’s not a “bridal boot camp” (gross) or a “21 day fix” (grosser) that’s going to change the heart and the essence of who you are – and that is what’s so breathtakingly beautiful about you. 

Image courtesy of Elise Margolin Photography

MYTH #2: If they didn’t bring a gift to your wedding, you don’t have to write them a thank you note.

We’ve talked a bit about guests who don’t bring gifts to your wedding (spoiler alert: you should be prepared for at least one of your guests to show up empty-handed). Yes it’s rude and yes it goes against social norms and cultural expectations. But remember – as much as we may think we know our guests’ financial situations, work-life balance, or family dynamics, we don’t.

Even if one of your guests shows up sans-envelope, they’ve still paid something to get to your wedding. Whether it’s time off from work that’s not compensated, gas money to drive a few hours, childcare fees, or a host of other expenses, your guests have to fork over money on top the amount they’ve written (or not written) on your check. And that deserves a thank you.

If you’re struggling with what to write in a card, a simple “thank you for celebrating our day with us” is totally fine! 

MYTH #3: You have to throw an engagement party/bridal shower/bachelorette party, even if you don’t want to. 

Once more for the people in the back: Brides, it is YOUR WEDDING and you get to call the shots. If you don’t want to hold a certain event, you absolutely do not have to hold it. Will others expect it? Will they be disappointed in your decisions? Maybe, but you are the bride and your happiness (and your fiancé’s!) is the most important.

At the heart of these events though, is love and celebration. Your friends and family members love you and they want to celebrate you, your fiancé, and the start of your amazing lives together. If being the center of attention at party after party isn’t your thing, think about other ways your loved ones can honor you. Maybe it’s a small lunch with one or two people, maybe it’s a registry where they can select a gift you’d cherish, or maybe it’s a montage of video messages put together by bridesmaid.