The newly renovated Sea Star Ballroom and Riverfront Room offer one-of-a-kind experiences for your big day.
Bride and groom near one of the habitats at Atlantis Banquets & Events. (Photo by Marco Photography & Video)
New and exciting things are happening at Atlantis Banquet & Events, a BOLI Preferred Venue, as it celebrates its 25th anniversary. From a completely renovated Sea Star Ballroom to the updated signature package menu, Brides of Long Island will not be disappointed on their wedding day.
Ballroom Water Views
The Sea Star Ballroom offers a blend of elegance, modern amenities, and a stunning waterfront setting. It is located along the Peconic River, which provides an unforgettable backdrop for your special day. And now, it’s newly renovated with a fresh new look. “We’ve updated our lighting, carpets and dance floor,” said Atlantis Banquets & Events Director of Sales Tony Cotignola. “It was time to do a little refresh, and it’s been completely modernized.”
What didn’t change were the expansive windows offering spectacular views of the water. They are better than ever no matter the time of day. Your daytime wedding will feature sunlit waterscapes, and evening brides will be treated to a glowing sunset reflecting off the river. The Sea Star Ballroom provides a captivating setting for any size wedding party – from 50 guests to 340!
Up Close Water Views in the Riverfront Room
Another renovation that you’re going to love is the Riverfront Room, which is perfect for cocktail hour, your ceremony or even a bridal shower or engagement party. “We’ve added some chandeliers and beach murals to make the space more modern,” said Cotignola.
The Riverfront Room overlooks the Peconic River and provides style and flexibility with beautiful views. “Our guests love the Riverfront Room because it offers an indoor option for those that might not want to be outside the entire time during a cocktail hour,” said Atlantis Banquets & Events Director of Food & Beverage Daniel Lanieri.
MORE: Why Atlantis Banquets & Events Is the Perfect Destination Wedding
Revamped Mouth-Watering Menu
No update would be complete without a brand new menu. “We created a whole new wedding package that we know our brides will love,” said Lanieri, who worked with their executive chef to ensure a cuisine full of seasonal flavors and the freshest sustainable ingredients. And the best part is the staff at Atlantis Banquets & Events works with each couple to put together a menu that is sure to leave guests raving. Whether you need vegetarian, gluten-free or kosher options, the team will cater to your every request.
From passed hors d’oeuvres and the carving station to specialty stations like sliders, tacos and flatbread pizza, your guests will definitely have a lot to choose from during the cocktail hour. “We are now offering a duet plate as the first course instead of a salad, which we’re excited about,” said Lanieri. Make sure you leave room for dessert! You can customize the wedding cake of your dreams, and then choose delicious enhancements such as dessert shooters or mini gelato bars.
Couple inside the Butterfly Experience at Atlantis Banquets & Events. (Photo by Marco Photography & Video)
MORE: Atlantis Banquets & Events Has Everything You Need For the Perfect Long Island Wedding
25 Years of Exceptional Service
No matter how many renovations Atlantis Banquet & Events does, they will still offer the same exceptional services and unique experiences that they have for the past 25 years. With several spaces for your cocktail hour and reception to three different hotel options, you and your guests will be treated like royalty on your wedding day or weekend.
In addition to the Sea Star Ballroom, you can host your cocktail hour or reception right in the aquarium where you’ll celebrate amid vibrant aquatic displays, including the Lost City of Atlantis Shark Habitat. For those staying the weekend, you can book a room block at the Hyatt Place, which is next to Atlantis Banquets & Events, or for something more modern you can reserve rooms right across the street at the Preston House & Hotel and the Howell House. Preston’s is an upscale boutique hotel. And you can rent the entire Howell House, which can accommodate up to 12 guests, for a more exclusive experience. There’s even a fireplace to keep you warm on cold winter nights!
Couple on the bridge at Atlantis Banquets & Events (Photo by EXO Photography)
MORE: Endless Options at Atlantis Banquets & Events
Let’s not forget even more unique experiences that can create an unforgettable wedding day with endless photo opportunities. “Our indoor butterfly garden offers amazing photos with tropical flowers, plants and, of course, butterflies,” said Director of Marketing at Atlantis Banquets & Events Darlene Puntillo. “You won’t find that anywhere else.” Some other unique spots around Atlantis Banquets & Events are the coral reef, the shark tunnel and the waterfall up on the bridge. Any of the fish habitats located throughout the aquarium are also the perfect backdrop for your wedding photos. And you can get friendly with some sea lions or even get married in a shark tank if you’re feeling adventurous on your wedding day.
This article is sponsored by Westbury Manor, a Brides of Long Island Preferred Venue!
Can you really take back a wedding invitation once it’s been given? Here are the times when it’s appropriate, and how to handle the situation.
It’s likely that your guest list was one of the first major decisions of your wedding planning process. Deciding who to include in one of the biggest days of your life takes time, and you’ll want to invite as many family members, friends, and loved ones as you can.
But what happens if you’ve invited someone and…well…something happens? And what happens when whatever that “something” was has you reconsidering their place on your guest list? Is it ever appropriate to take back a wedding invitation?
Save the dates vs. Formal invitations
While save the dates aren’t the same as a formal wedding invitation, you should still only send save the dates to those you’re definitely inviting to the wedding. You’re quite literally asking your guest to save the date of your wedding and not schedule any conflicting events. This can be a considerable ask, especially if your wedding is taking place during peak vacation season or around the holidays.
What if you’ve changed your mind about a certain guest, but have already sent them a save the date? Is just NOT sending them a formal invite an option? In certain circumstances yes, but with a few caveats. More on that below.
Image courtesy of Stories by Victoria
When to take back a wedding invitation
If you’ve already sent a formal invitation, consider that invite pretty much set in stone. Rescinding a wedding invitation should always be considered an absolute last resort, and you should always make that decision after a lot of thought and reflection.
Here are the situations that may warrant taking back an invite:
- A divorce or break up. If one of your guests announces an unexpected split from their romantic partner, you may want to consider adjusting your invite list accordingly. This can be entirely situational, though — if your guest and their ex are still on good terms (and you’re still on good terms), you may want to keep their invite in tact. If there was a lot of drama and hurt feelings in the separation, you may decide to disinvite the former romantic partner.
- A major fight or falling out. Relationships aren’t perfect. We can all say things we don’t mean, or get into arguments that seem to have no resolution. If you’ve had a major blow out with one of your guests — the kind that threatens your relationship altogether — let some time pass before making any decisions. After a few days, collect your thoughts and talk to your fiancé. Disinviting a guest is a major step that makes a major statement, and the two of you should be on the same page.
- Recent instances of inappropriate behavior. That one friend almost ruined your bachelorette party, and your terrified they’ll do the same at your wedding. The first step is ALWAYS communication, and explaining why their behavior has you worried. They could be going through a rough time and need some help that you can provide. If that’s not the case, and having a heart-to-heart didn’t seem to make matters any better, you may want to consider taking back their invite.
- A change in your wedding plans. You might have scored the venue, sent out the invite list, and then suddenly realized…you want a destination wedding instead. Circumstances change, and your guest list may have to as well.
Image courtesy of RF Films | Photography
How to take back a wedding invitation
Taking back a wedding invitation doesn’t happen that often, so there isn’t a standard way to proceed. Overall, remember to remain respectful and keep heightened emotions out of the conversation.
- Be direct. Once you’ve made your decision, don’t wait to tell them or assume they’ll figure it out on their own. Remember — attending a wedding costs money for most people, and you’ll want to let them know before they’ve booked any non-refundable travel or hotel accommodations.
- Decide how best to break the news. Some situations may call for a face-to-face conversation. Some interactions will feel more appropriate via email or text. You may want to take the lead with certain guests, or your fiancé may be a more appropriate choice to navigate the discussion. Think about all these variables first.
- Give a reason why. If your plans have changed and your guest list needs to be altered as a result, offer a full but succinct reason to your disinvited guests. Many print companies like Minted or Zazzle offer pre-written “change of plans” cards that can be sent to those who’ve been previously invited. If the reason is more complicated than that, you should still offer an explanation. Try writing things out first, before you initiate a conversation.
- If you’ve sent a save the date but not an invite, you can hold off on mailing that thick envelope, but — again — you should still offer an explanation. Don’t just NOT send them an invite without a more detailed reasoning, because they may show up on the big day after all.
No matter the circumstances, it’s important to navigate changes in your guest list with thought, care, and empathy.
BOLI Preferred Vendor Don’t Toss the Bouquet takes your wedding day florals and donates them nursing homes, hospices, and other local organizations.
Photo courtesy of Don’t Toss the Bouquet
You spend countless hours (and countless dollars) deciding on your wedding day florals. Your bouquets, boutonnieres, centerpieces and accents bring color and beauty to your day, and enhance every part of your celebration.
But when the wedding day has come and gone, many brides of Long Island wonder what to do with all those leftover buds and blooms. Some choose to preserve a few petals, but what about the rest? Should you make peace with the fact that your gorgeous flowers will eventually end up in the garbage?
You don’t have to, thanks to BOLI Preferred Vendor Don’t Toss the Bouquet. Instead of throwing your flowers away, owner Christa Morris brings your flowers to those who need a little cheering up in our community.
Bringing Joy to Others
Christa was inspired to start a donation service after many brides offered their centerpieces and bouquets. “Many couples were rushing off to their honeymoons right after their weddings, and while I couldn’t accommodate such large quantities at the time, it always felt like such a shame to see all those beautiful flowers go to waste,” she said.
After a bit a brainstorming, she decided to start a donation service — with immediate positive results. “Our first donation came from Erin at Stonebridge Country Club [a BOLI Preferred Venue]. We repurposed her flowers and delivered them to multiple locations, creating joy not only for the people receiving the flowers but also for the bride herself.”
How flower donation works
Image courtesy of Don’t Toss the Bouquet
Impacting the community — one stem at a time
An added benefit for the happy couple
As of 2025, you can now claim your donated flowers as a tax deduction! “The process is pretty simple since we also run a nonprofit 501c3,” Christa said. “After the wedding, brides receive a donation receipt that includes our EIN number. They can provide this receipt to their accountant to claim a tax deduction for donating to a charitable organization. It’s an easy way to give back while also receiving a financial benefit.”
Beautiful moments, when they’re needed most
A well-deserved second life
Christa recognizes the immense talents of local florists, which makes the donations even more impactful. “I see firsthand how much effort florists put into their creations—the artistry, the time, and the care that goes into every arrangement,” she described. “The fact that these designs often only last for five hours before ending up in a dumpster is heartbreaking. That’s another reason why donating flowers is so meaningful. Seeing them get a second life, bringing comfort and joy to others, is not just a beautiful gesture—it’s also a true testament to the talent and dedication of the floral community.”
With so much on your plate, let Personal Escape Travel handle all the details of your destination wedding or honeymoon.
(Photo courtesy of Sandals)
Whether you’re looking to plan a destination wedding, your dream honeymoon or maybe a trip to celebrate your anniversary, Susan Blume, CTC and her team at Personal Escape Travel, a BOLI Preferred Vendor, is ready to make all of your wedding and travel dreams come true. With over 35 years experience in the travel industry, Blume is certified travel counselor with Sandals and Beaches Resorts, and she can’t wait to plan your next adventure.
Travel Passion
Blume says she developed a passion for travel while working part-time for a travel agency owned by her father’s friend. That passion developed further when her husband was a US Army ranger stationed in Germany. Having been in the travel industry for a few years, Blume was hired by the military in Germany. “I worked in the recreation, morale and welfare department,” says Blume. “I would plan day trips and tours for the military personnel and their families. We would travel to Prague and other parts of Germany, and take pottery or glass blowing tours.” Blume says it was a lot of work, but she loved not only being able to be a travel agent, but also traveling overseas.
When they moved back to the US for her husband’s next tour of duty, Blume got culinary training and took on the role of assistant manager at the Officers’ Club. “I would oversee daily operations, as well as events for over 500 guests,” she says. “I would plan the military balls. It was an interesting time.”
(Photo courtesy of Personal Escape Travel)
Back to Her Roots
While Blume worked for the military, she never lost sight of her roots and ran a travel agency as a side business. When her husband got out of the military, they moved back to New York and she established Personal Escape Travel in 1998. “I wanted to combine my travel agent background with my culinary background, that’s why I specialize in destination weddings and honeymoons.” Blume says her experience in the military has helped her to understand how to coordinate a lot of moving pieces and make everyone happy – something she focuses on while planning destination weddings. “I love talking to new people, and there’s no shortage of things in travel – from where to go and what you want to experience.”
From Dream to Reality
If you’re looking to plan a destination wedding and you’re not sure where to start, Blume says she can help you from the minute you contact her to the minute you come back from your honeymoon. Since she is Sandals certified, she knows exactly which resorts would be perfect for everyone, and which resorts can accommodate children or even special needs guests. Blume takes her time learning about what you like and what you don’t like. She’ll also take the time to learn not just about you but about your guests. “I need to figure out which resort will best fit not just the wants of the couple but the needs of the entire wedding,” says Blume. “For example, if grandma is in a wheelchair, I can recommend which resorts will be easier for her to get around.”
Once she learns all of the details for the wedding, she’ll make suggestions on which resort would be best for her couples. She’ll then connect with the resorts’ wedding coordinators to find out availability and pricing. “What I love most is, I’m not just planning a wedding for my couples,” she says. “I’m helping to plan the whole experience – from a welcome party or rehearsal dinner to the reception and next day brunch.” But there’s more! Blume will also coordinate rooms for all of your guests, keep track of your contracts, and “I’ll even jump in and help with invitations and favors.” She adds that she not only works with resorts but also local bridal vendors to coordinate things like tuxedo rentals.
(Photo courtesy of Sandals)
The Perfect Paradise
The best part about having Blume help plan your dream wedding or honeymoon? Her recommendations are based on personal experience. She has traveled to many of the Sandals resorts and can confidently say that you’ll be getting five-star service. If you’ll be having children or teenagers at your wedding, she knows that Beaches Turks and Caicos can make guests of all ages entertained. “It’s also a short flight and offers 21 restaurants on site as well as a water park,” she says. If you’re having an adults-only wedding, she recommends a newer resort on Saint Vincent or Curacao. “Both islands are beautiful and the resorts are filled with white sand beaches and plenty of activities,” she says.
When it comes to a honeymoon, Blume says she’ll also find out what’s important for the couple. “Do they want more activities and adventure? Or do they just want to relax?” she says. All of the resorts offer snorkeling and water sports. However, she says if scuba diving is your thing, then Beaches Turks and Caicos or Saint Lucia are great. Saint Lucia has three Sandals properties, and offers exchange privileges for guests, which means they can visit any of the resorts and take advantage of all of the restaurants and amenities. “Saint Lucia is one of my favorite islands!” she says. “Not only are the Sandals resorts beautiful, but the island itself offers so much adventure – from volcano tours to mud baths and hot springs, it’s perfect for everyone.”
(Photo courtesy of Sandals)
Plan Ahead and Relax
Whether you’re planning your destination wedding or honeymoon, Blume says it’s best to start planning sooner rather than later. “Just like wedding venues on Long Island, destination wedding resorts book up quickly,” she says. “In fact, I have couples that are booked all the way into 2027.” For honeymooners, she reminds couples that the more popular rooms – like the over-the-water bungalows or private rondovals – sell out up to a year in advance.
The biggest piece of advice Blume has for her couples, “Trust me! Once you book with me, let me do the rest. Let me worry about your guests. Let me worry about those small details. I take on all of the stress so you don’t have to. Everything will be perfect.”
(Photo courtesy of Personal Escape Travel)
In Brides of Long Island’s “Am I a Bridezilla?” the BOLI team weighs in on an anonymous submission asking that dreaded question. What do you think?
Dear BOLI,
I’m in my mid thirties and getting married for the second time. My first wedding when I was in my early twenties. We got divorced after about 3 years.
I had a bridal shower and bachelorette party for my first wedding, but because my friends and I were in college (aka young and broke), it wasn’t anything big. Now that we’re all older and financially secure, I wanted to do something more substantial for both. I was thinking a brunch at a nice restaurant for the shower, and trip to Nashville for the bachelorette.
When I proposed this to my maid-of-honor, she scoffed. She said because I’d gotten married before and had those experiences already, doing it again would be too much to ask. When I kept reminding her that my shower and bachelorette were so small the first time, she called me a bridezilla.
Am I a bridezilla for wanting a bridal shower and bachelorette party again, even though I already had one for my first marriage?
Signed,
Round two
Dear Round two,
No, you’re not a bridezilla for wanting a bridal shower and bachelorette party — even if you’ve already had them both.
According to your timeline, it looks like there’s been a good ten years or so between your first wedding and this one. If you had gotten married, divorced, and re-engaged in a span of one or two years, asking for another set of big parties might be overkill. A decade is plenty of breathing room between these events.
Some may argue that bridal showers and bachelorette parties are only for first-time brides, but at the end of the day it’s YOUR wedding. You get to celebrate it however you want. And unless your bridal party is made up of the exact same people as your first wedding, these events won’t be a “repeat” for everyone.
I will challenge you on a few ideas, though. You mentioned that your friends are now older and “financially secure,” but you never know someone’s financial state unless you’re looking at their bank accounts. Your maid-of-honor might have had that reaction because she’d struggle to pay for a “more substantial” bridal shower and bachelorette.
I’ll also throw out this possibility: if she was your maid-of-honor for your first wedding, she may have pulled out all the stops to throw a bridal party and bachelorette for you — even if it wasn’t what you’d consider “big.” She might be offended that you now considered those events to be “so small.”
It’s worth it to sit down with your entire bridal party and discuss your expectations, then you can determine whether a nice brunch and out-of-state trip is going to be realistic for everyone. If it’s not, try to brainstorm different options. “More substantial” doesn’t have to mean “more expensive.” You can explore budget-friendly restaurants for a bridal shower brunch, or even a potluck at someone’s house. For your bachelorette, there are plenty of fun road trip destinations for a weekend closer to home.
The thing that will make these events more memorable is not the location or the cost, it’s the quality time you spend with your best friends.
Wondering if YOU’RE a bridezilla? Email your anonymous questions to jennifer@bridesofli.com
At a loss of where to begin with planning your honeymoon? These specialists have you covered.
We get it. You’re deep into wedding planning, and the thought of planning your honeymoon – which is supposed to be relaxing after your big day – is giving you anxiety. Well, don’t worry. Brides of Long Island has the best honeymoon specialists on Long Island. These specialists will make your dream honeymoon come true. Want a relaxing beach vacation? Done. Something more adventurous? No problem. Looking to explore a new country? Let’s go. These honeymoon specialists on Long Island will plan every detail – and throw in some perks – to make sure you have the trip of a lifetime after your wedding day.
(Photo courtesy of Melissa at Tripguy Travel)
Melissa at Tripguy Travel
With firsthand experience on exotic vacations from the South Pacific to Europe and across the country, Melissa at Tripguy Travel is the perfect honeymoon specialist to plan your getaway. She knows the best deals and will help you decide on the perfect destination for your once in a lifetime honeymoon.
(Photo courtesy of You and Me By the Sea Travel)
You and Me By the Sea Travel
With over 30 years experience, Christine at You and Me By the Sea Travel will not only help book your perfect honeymoon, but she’ll curate an itinerary unique to the wants and needs (and wildest dreams) of you and your future spouse. From Disney and Sandals honeymoons to the exotic islands of French Polynesia, Christine is ready to plan the honeymoon of your dreams. And if you are looking to plan a destination wedding, Christine is here to help.
(Photo courtesy of Luxury Travel by Maria)
Luxury Travel by Maria
Luxury Travel by Maria believes experiencing new cultures is at the heart of travel, and she can’t wait to plan the perfect honeymoon for you to explore a new destination. And if relaxing after your big day is more your speed, Maria has experience with all kinds of vacations to cater to your every need.
(Photo courtesy of Ginger Peachy Travel)
With over 30 years experience, Ginger Peachy Travel is ready to plan the perfect vacation after your wedding day. They work one-on-one with brides to create their dream honeymoon and work with any budget. They also specialize in destination weddings.
MORE: 5 Beautiful Mini-Moon Destinations That Don’t Require a Passport
(Photo courtesy of Sandals via Magical Compass Vacations)
Magical Compass Vacations
Erin of Magical Compass Vacations is not just a travel agent looking to plan your dream honeymoon – she’s a former BOLI just like you! From exotic locations around the world to magical Disney World escapes, Erin can do it all. Tell her your dream vacation, and she’ll do the rest – giving you a stress-free honeymoon planning experience.
(Photo courtesy of Denville Travel Company)
Denville Travel Company
Ashley is another former BOLI looking to help her fellow brides plan their dream honeymoon! From destination weddings and all inclusive resorts to Europe and the South Pacific, Ashley’s passion is to craft the honeymoon you’ve always dreamed of.
MORE: Honeymoon destinations that won’t break the bank
(Photo courtesy of Personal Escape Travel)
Personal Travel Escape
If you’re looking for the perfect destination wedding or honeymoon, let Susan from Personal Escape Travel do all the work. Having visited many of the places she specializes in, she wants to hear your dream and make it a reality.
No matter where your dream honeymoon is, our specialists are ready to make those dreams a reality without the hassle of planning yourself. So, dream big, and enjoy yourself as you sip that cocktail or explore a new country with your new spouse.
This article is sponsored by Heritage House, a Brides of Long Island Preferred Vendor!
Here are the questions to ask for the shoe game — the super popular bridal shower event!
Your bridal shower will be a highlight in your wedding planning process. But besides opening gifts (or not), munching on delicious goodies, and sipping on your favorite cocktails…what else do you do at a shower?
A popular choice for many brides-to-be is “the shoe game.” In this lively (and often hilarious) game, the brides and/or grooms-to-be sit back to back each holding one of their own shoes and one of their partner’s shoes. A question is asked, and the fiancés hold up the corresponding shoe to answer. So for example, if the question is “who said ‘I love you’ first,” the bride would hold up her own shoe if she’s the one who first let those 3 magic words slip.
Here are the 25 of the best questions to ask for the shoe game, sure to bring a few laughs (and heartfelt memories!) to your bridal shower.
- Who made the first move?
- Who asked to make your relationship “official”?
- Who picked out the ring?
- Who said “I love you” first?
- Who is the better cook?
- Who is the better driver?
- Who is the cleanest?
- Who is the planner?
- Who wakes up first in the morning?
- Who’s more likely to take care of bugs in the house?
- Who has the worst handwriting?
- Who has the most exes?
- Who is the most romantic?
- Who is the funniest?
- Who is more patient?
- Who is the better dancer?
- Who is more stubborn?
- Who falls asleep first?
- Who spends more money?
- Who is more likely to get lost?
- Who DMs the most reels everyday?
- Who is more likely to make an Instagram anniversary post?
- Who is the bigger talker?
- Who is the bigger extrovert?
- Who is the most adventurous?
In Brides of Long Island’s Monthly “Mrs.” series, we profile some of our members’ unforgettable weddings. This month, Clarissa talks about planning her wedding on a budget, and how her photographer went above and beyond for her before and after the wedding.
(Photo courtesy of Bernard Alexis Photography)
Clarissa and Kevin knew when they got engaged that they would be paying for it themselves. They were cognizant of their budget, and were able to find a hidden gem in the Essex Club, a BOLI Preferred Venue. Essex Club not only worked with them to plan their dream wedding, but made sure everything ran smoothly on their wedding day.
A High School Love….After College
Clarissa and Kevin went to the same high school, but didn’t run in the same crowd. They knew of each other and friended each other on social media, but that was it. When Clarissa got back from college in 2015, they slid into each other’s DMs. Eight years later at Clarissa’s 30th birthday party, Kevin proposed as she blew out her candles in front of their family and friends. “We had just bought a house together, and were hosting my birthday party,” said Clarissa. “He didn’t tell anyone, so we were all surprised. It was perfect because everyone we love was there.”
Tweaking a Party Package
As Clarissa and Kevin started venue shopping in the summer of 2023, they had a little bit of a sticker shock. “We knew we wanted a smaller wedding,” said Clarissa. “And we were paying for it ourselves, so we needed to find a venue that fit within our budget.” And that venue was the Essex Club in Brentwood. “It also had a beautiful ballroom, and only hosted one wedding at a time, which was important to us,” said Clarissa. And since their wedding was on November 9, 2024, Clarissa and Kevin were thrilled they were able to get a Saturday night reception for winter pricing.
The Essex Club offered a package that included different vendors, and they decided to use most of those vendors – including the DJ, florist and transportation service. They also were able to get a discount with Long Island Party Walls for their flower wall, champagne wall and seating chart. But when it came to their photography, Clarissa and Kevin strayed from the package. “I had heard of Bernard Alexis from friends and family,” said Clarissa, of Bernard Alexis Photography, a BOLI Preferred Vendor. “But I was so impressed when we had our consultation. He was the only photographer who pointed out that due to daylight saving time, I wasn’t going to have daylight for photos.” As a result of their consultation, Clarissa not only booked Bernard, but she changed the time of her wedding. “I called the church and moved up our ceremony to 12:30 p.m. And then I called the Essex Club and moved up our cocktail hour start time.”
(Photo courtesy of Bernard Alexis Photography)
MORE: Essex Club offers versatility, affordability, and charm
Taking the Time to Breathe
Clarissa didn’t let any hiccups bother her on her wedding day. In fact, when a groomsman noticed the seating chart was missing a few guests, Jessica from the Essex Club jumped in and got it fixed. “Jessica was our sales person throughout the planning process,” explained Clarissa. “She was really only supposed to be there to set up, but she immediately helped out to get the seating chart fixed. I barely had time to even think about it.” Clarissa adds that she didn’t really have a creative vision on how to set up the ballroom, and Jessica did a great job creating her own vision to set up that flower wall and champagne wall with sage greenery. “It was so beautiful when we walked in,” said Clarissa.
MORE: How to make a wedding budget
Clarissa’s favorite moment of the night? When she and Kevin took about a half hour to sit in the bridal suite and soak in the day between pictures and cocktail hour. “The maitre’d whisked us away and set out cocktail hour food for us in the suite,” she said. “It was great to just decompress and recap our ceremony and envision how we wanted the rest of the evening to go.” Clarissa and Kevin then made sure to greet guests during the rest of the cocktail hour, so they could dance the night away during the reception and afterparty.
After their wedding, Clarissa had a death in the family. As they were searching for photos for her uncle’s service, she realized the most current one was at her wedding. “I reached out to Bernard to see if he could expedite a specific photo of my uncle. And within a day or two, he sent it over,” said Clarissa. “Bernard truly went above and beyond from before we even booked him to after our wedding day during a difficult time. He didn’t have to do any of that, but he did, and I’m beyond grateful.”
(Photo courtesy of Bernard Alexis Photography)
Go With the Flow
Clarissa researched every single vendor that she used (and didn’t use) on the Brides of Long Island Facebook page. “I was so grateful for all of the honest reviews that all of the brides leave,” said Clarissa. And now that she’s graduated from bride to wife, Clarissa wants future brides to remember that even if things don’t go the way you planned, just go with the flow. “Everyone was so impressed with how calm I was – even when the DJ introduced us with a different last name!” said Clarissa. “But it’s not worth the stress. Things will happen, but they shouldn’t be enough to ruin your day.”
MORE: Don’t sweat the small stuff
Clarissa also adds that you need to make sure you do what you and your future spouse want, and not to let other people’s opinions sway your decisions. “For us, it was important that we keep our guest list to no more than 100 people,” she said. “We didn’t want strangers in our photos. And even when people asked if we could include others, we stood our ground. It’s your wedding day – don’t let anyone else tell you what you want.”
(Photo courtesy of Bernard Alexis Photography)
Vendors:
Venue: Essex Club, a BOLI Preferred Venue
Photographer: Bernard Alexis Photography, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
Videography: JL Wedding Films
DJ: Just For the Record
Florist: Tom’s Towers Flowers, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
Hair: @Samantha.ashleyy_
Makeup: Amber Taylor Artistry
Dress: North Fork Bridal Shoppe, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
Cake: Campbell’s Bakery, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
Tuxedos: Rico’s Clothing, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
Transportation: Mark of Elegance, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
Flower Wall/Champagne Wall/Seating Chart: Long Island Party Walls
Honeymoon: Melissa at Tripguy Travel, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
While designing your own invitations can save you money, it can also be time consuming.
The date is set. Your vendors are booked. The excitement is building. And now it’s time to focus on getting those invites out to all of your guests. But where to begin? You can certainly check out BOLI’s Preferred Vendor list for invitations and stationery, or you can do-it-yourself. But what does that mean exactly? Well, it could mean checking out a website and designing your own wedding invitations with their templates. Or it could mean you breaking out your graphic design skills in a program like Canva to create your own personal masterpiece. Either way, here are some pros and cons of DIY wedding invitations.
Pro: It Saves You Money
Let’s all be real for a minute: that invitation you’re sending out, while beautiful, will live on someone’s refrigerator until the big day and then get tossed in the trash. So designing your own – be it on a website template or on your own – makes sense because it saves you money in the end. It could save you in stamps too, as an invite you design probably weighs less!
Con: It’s Time Consuming
What you save in money, though, will cost you in time. If you want something simple it might be quicker, but more elaborate designs could take a lot longer to design.
MORE: How to Make a Small Wedding Guest List
Pro: You Get Exactly What You Want
Just like the rest of your wedding planning, you might have a specific vision in mind for your invitations. If you plan to do DIY wedding invitations, you can bring that vision to life exactly as you want, without having to explain it to someone else.
Con: Technical Difficulties
If you’re a graphic designer by nature or profession, just skip right over this one. If you’re not that design savvy, you could run into technical difficulties. For example, you might run into trouble getting the font size or dimensions just right in a website template. If you’re trying something like Canva the first time and starting from scratch, it could take some time to learn the program. Pro Tip: If you’re not that technologically savvy, you could ask a friend who is!
MORE: 9 Wedding DIY Ideas That Any BOLI Can Tackle
Pro: A Good Ole Pat on the Back
There’s a level of satisfaction that comes from completing DIY projects, and DIY wedding invitations are no exception. It will feel good once you drop them in the mail knowing that you created them. And once guests start raving about how great they are, you’ll feel even more satisfied that your hard work paid off.
Con: Printing Frustration
If you’ve ever tried to print out address labels, you know it can be frustrating. Designing and printing your wedding invitations might get just as frustrating, if not more. Not to mention that you’ll want to get the right paper.
If you’ve designed the invite, it is probably best to leave the printing to the experts. This way you’ll save yourself that extra headache or trying to get it perfect. If you’re using a website template, some companies will send you a sample ahead of time so you can confirm it’s what you want.
Pro: Putting Your Own Stamp On It
When it comes to our wedding, we want to be in control and have a hand in everything. DIY wedding invitations are a good way to put your own ‘stamp’ on things without breaking the bank. While it may be time consuming, it could be one of the easier DIY projects you do for your wedding.
MORE: How to address your wedding invitations
Con: Don’t Forget the Envelopes
As you’re designing, don’t forget to design a fun envelope – if you so choose. Again, this could get tricky and time consuming, but it could also save you the headache of printing out address labels!
However you decide to create your wedding invitations, know that they will be beautiful. And when your loved ones see it in their mailbox, they’ll be super excited that your special day is getting closer and closer!
After BOLI Megan got married, she wondered what to do with her wedding dress. Her decision changed two women’s lives for the better.
Some of us dream of our wedding dress for years, and some scroll through social media looking for inspiration. No matter what kind of bride you are, your wedding dress will undoubtedly hold lots of meaning between all those stitches and beads.
But after your wedding day is over, your wedding dress will also hold lots of space. While many brides want to hang on to their gowns indefinitely, others can’t justify keeping something they’ll likely never wear again.
It was a conundrum that BOLI Megan wanted to figure out even before her big day had arrived – what do you do with your dress after the wedding?
An important decision
Megan got the ‘magical moment’ all brides hope for when dress shopping. “I knew from the moment I looked at myself in the mirror, it was what I wanted to wear on my wedding day,” she said. “I also knew that even though this dress was everything I dreamed about, I felt impractical about hanging on to it beyond the wedding.”
She had an idea in mind, and turned to loved ones for advice. “I decided pretty early on that the best way to honor my dress was to pass it along to the next bride. I shared this with the people in my inner circle, and a few of them encouraged me to think about it longer or consider selling the dress instead. I did look into the option of selling which did not make me feel good. I also considered preserving it, but that also made me feel like I was keeping it for the sake of keeping it. It no longer served a purpose in my life.”
Image courtesy of Captured by Christina Anne Photography
Firm in her decision to donate, Megan began to think about how best to go about the process. “I absolutely love being a part of the Brides of Long Island community, and have felt a strong sense of sisterhood among members,” she commented. “I thought that if I offered my dress up on the BOLI Facebook group, I was more likely to give it to someone who is a part of my local community, which I loved. I put all the information up on the group about my dress plus a bunch of pictures, and got quick interest.”
A happy time marked with mourning
For BOLI Jenn, a trip to the mountains turned into a day she’ll never forget. “My fiancé proposed to me on October 19, 2024 after four years of being together,” she remembered. “We were vacationing in the Poconos and he surprised me with a beautiful ring.”
She first told good news to her beloved 88-year old grandmother. “This lady raised me and was so happy for us,” she said. “The next time I saw her, she told me she wanted to help me buy my gown as her last gift to me. Unfortunately, my happiness was pulled out from under me when I got a call on November 15th to inform me that her Hospice nurse found her deceased. My heart felt like it was ripped out of my chest.”
Image courtesy of Foxlight Studios
After her grandmother passed, Jenn found it hard to focus on wedding planning. “I was scrolling through different wedding pages, trying to get back into the wedding spirit. It was then that I was on BOLI and came across Megan’s post.”
A connection over DM
After seeing Megan’s post, Jenn decided to send her a message. “I explained what I had been through and told her how I was grieving my ma, finances were tight, and I would love to be considered.”
Jenn’s message was the first that Megan received. “She said this was her ‘dream dress’ (same), was kind and gracious throughout our conversation and offered additional information about her wedding and personal circumstances, which she certainly didn’t have to do, but it made me feel so right about passing this dress on to her.”
Image courtesy of Create Studioworks
A beautiful dress, a beautiful new owner
“We messaged in the morning and she came to my house to pick up the dress that afternoon,” Megan explained. “We hugged, introduced ourselves, and talked about wedding planning. Then she took the dress and that was that. I felt no regret – just happiness for how beautifully this all unfolded.”
That happiness was cemented even further when Jenn sent pictures. “She was kind enough to send me photos after she tried it on and said it fit perfectly. She was right! It looks like it was made for her. She is a vision!”
Image courtesy of Heritage House
“Megan helped to restore my happiness and excitement for my wedding,” Jenn said. “We both felt like this was a sign that my ma was still working her magic from heaven to make sure I got my dream gown. An expense I would’ve never been able to afford has now been lifted and I was able to focus on crafting my flowers and decorations for my upcoming elopement.”
Jenn and her fiancé will say “I do” in western Maryland this July, in a treehouse with two wonderful friends by their side. And of course, Megan is looking forward to seeing pictures of their gorgeous event.
Image courtesy of RF Films
“A little bit of kindness went a very long way.”
Both Megan and Jenn have some words of wisdom for future Brides of Long Island. “If you’re not enthusiastic about keeping your dress, this is something to consider,” Megan advised. “Giving it a new life with the next bride made me feel so good. When I considered that I might have any regret, I quickly remembered all the other mementos I still have – my veil, my photos and videos, a signed book from our guests, all of our cards, the portrait from our live wedding painter which hangs proudly in my home, and most importantly, a beautiful life with my husband.”
Jenn is also considering passing the gown along after her big day is done. “I discussed with Megan that I do have a daughter who is engaged, and I’d first like to see if she wants the gown or if she’d want to save it for my granddaughter,” she said. “If not, I’d like to keep paying it forward and put up a similar post like Megan did. The world can be a really harsh place and we never know what other people’s struggles are. A little bit of kindness went a very long way.”