5 Topics to Discuss with Your In-Laws

This article brought to you by Port Jefferson Country Club, a Brides of Long Island Preferred Venue!

Nervous about keeping the conversation going? Here are 5 fun topics to discuss with your in-laws at the next holiday gathering!

The holidays are here, and with that comes some much-anticipated family time. More likely than not, you’re splitting a few festive get-togethers between your family and your fiancé’s family. And while there’s no shortage of things you feel comfortable discussing with your own folks, that may not be the case with your future in-laws.

Maybe you’re on the shy side or maybe you just don’t know them that well, but having to keep the convo going at your in-laws may feel somewhat daunting. What happens when there’s that awkward moment of silence and you don’t know how to fill it? You know to avoid politics and religion, but what are some easy things you can talk about? Fear not, brides of Long Island — here are 5 fun, stress-free topics to discuss with your in-laws.

• MORE: How to Split the Holidays Between Your Family and Your In-Laws

1. Wedding planning

This one is a no-brainer! Your in-laws may be relatively involved with the wedding planning process, but you can keep them up-to-date on details they might not know — your bridal shower and bachelorette, the flowers you’re choosing for the bouquets, finally deciding on a playlist. There are lots of things to discuss when it comes to your big day.

2. Memories from your fiancé’s childhood

Your fiancé can’t get enough of the Yankees, so ask mom and dad when this obsession started! They’re sure to share some funny and heartfelt moments from your fiancé’s childhood. Just be sure to steer clear of any topics that might be sensitive to your fiancé.

3. Their friend groups and social circles

You love a little hot gossip, no matter the age range. Ask about your future MIL’s crafting group or your future FIL’s golf buddies. They may have some exciting things to share (or some funny things to vent!) That can also give you some topics to discuss for the future — “hey, how’s your knitting friend doing?”

• MORE: Tips for Your First Thanksgiving with Your In-Laws

4. Holiday traditions from their past

Every family does something slightly different for the holidays. This is a perfect time to learn about their favorite traditions, and share some of your own with them. 

5. Pop culture and sports

When all else fails, pop culture and sports teams are super easy topics. Has your future MIL seen the new Wicked movie? Can your future FIL believe the last Giants game? You may want to do a little research to see what they’re into, but showing investment in their interests can also nab you some in-law brownie points. 

• MORE: No-stress wedding planning with Ring Leader

This article sponsored by Absolute Entertainment, a Brides of Long Island Preferred Vendor!

 

Celebrate with self-care! These ideas will help you bring wellness to your wedding weekend

Some brides of Long Island can’t wait to hit the dance floor with their signature cocktail in hand. But others may be more inclined to mindfulness and meditation than Whiskey Sours and “September.”

Neither desire is wrong! Your wedding is a reflection of you, your love story, and both of your personalities. If the traditional wedding activities aren’t really your style, here are a few ideas that can bring “wellness” into your wedding weekend.

• MORE: 20 Self-Care Ideas During Wedding Planning

Welcome your guests with a physical activity

There’s nothing that says your welcome party has to be a “party.” Welcome guests to your wedding weekend by inviting them to a group activity, like a yoga class, OrangeTheory workout, or 5K walk/run. 

Of course, you’ll need to consider any limitations your guests may have. If your 80 year old grandmother is in a wheelchair, she may not be able to participate in anything too demanding. Be sure to have some alternatives lined up for those who can’t participate. 

Enjoy a spa day with family and friends before “I do”

Sure, getting manicures and massages are great ideas for the bachelorette. But the nerves can be pretty intense in those hours before the big day! There’s no better time to focus on relaxation and reflection. Sharing that time with those closest to you can enhance your bond and relieve some stress for everyone.

A different kind of “open bar.”

Who says your libations have to be alcoholic? Consider offering your guests herbal teas, fruit-infused waters, or beverages with adaptogens. You don’t have to stop at the reception, either — consider tea bags for your favors or special drinks for your after party.

• MORE: 7 Best Alternatives for Favors

Get a drip

There are many concierge services that offer personalized IV drips. These formulas can help boost your immunity, hydration, and even mental focus. A quick drip before “I do” may be just what the doctor ordered!

A sound bath or meditation before the ceremony

Sound baths can provide a grounding, meditative experience for those involved. What better way to bring everyone to the present moment? Even if sound baths aren’t your thing, asking your officiant to lead in a brief meditation before the beginning of your ceremony can bring a calm, centered energy to the day.

• MORE: No stress wedding planning with Ring Leader

Before you run off and say “I do,” here are some helpful tips to plan your elopement.

Whether you want to skip planning a wedding or you’ve just always wanted to keep things low-key, an elopement is the perfect way to celebrate your love with less stress and more focus on you and your future spouse. But before you run off to say “I do,” you’ll want to thoughtfully prepare for logistics, legalities and how to make the day feel special and true to you. Before you start to worry, we’re here with some tips on how to plan the perfect elopement.

Set a Budget

Just as if you were planning a full wedding ceremony and reception, you should still set a budget for your perfect elopement. If you’re traveling, consider how much you’re comfortable spending on travel expenses and factor that into your wedding day itself.

Pick a Meaningful Location

The sky is the limit when picking a location. To narrow it down, choose a location that is important to you and your spouse. Perhaps you have a favorite vacation spot. Or if you want to stay closer to home, maybe pick a spot you frequent or where you went on your first date. Consider your backyard to keep it closest to home.

• MORE: How to Choose the Best Destination for your Destination Wedding

Check Legal Requirements and Secure Permits

Wherever you choose, it’s important to check any requirements to make sure your marriage is legal. If you’re eloping in another country or state, check the requirements on marriage licenses and what you’ll need to do on the day of your wedding.

If you’re planning to have your ceremony outdoors at a park or public space, check if you’ll need a permit and how to secure it. And make sure to factor in any fees into your budget.

Decide on Vendors and Guests

Depending on your preference, decide on if you’ll need any vendors. Perhaps you just want a photographer to document the day. Or maybe a content creator would be the perfect option for you. Other vendors to consider are officiants (if you’re having a friend or family member preside, make sure they have the proper paperwork wherever you are), flowers, hair and makeup.

As far as guests, again, this is your preference. Do you want a few close friends and family? If you’re not sure, and want to keep it very low key, consider just having you and your future spouse and an officiant – and let people know after!

• MORE: New State Law Allows Friends and Family to Officiate Weddings

Create a Timeline

No matter where you elope, it’s important to make a loose timeline, especially if travel is involved. But don’t stress over it. Remember – this day is about you and should be stress-free. The schedule is just a way to keep the day flowing.

Add Meaningful Touches

Write your own vows. Play your favorite song. Wear your favorite outfits. Share your favorite drinks. Make the day yours!

Celebrate Later

Once you have your perfect elopement, consider celebrating later with family and friends. It can be a casual dinner at home or a small, intimate get together at your favorite restaurant. But if you want to skip the celebration, that’s OK too!

• MORE: 7 reasons to have a destination wedding

Announce Your Marriage

If you feel so moved, announce your marriage however you feel comfortable. A mailed card with a photo from the day or maybe just an email or social media post. Or skip this all together, and surprise your friends the next time you see them!

Just as with your wedding ceremony and reception, your elopement can be as big or intimate as you want it.  The key is making the day your own and celebrating this next chapter together.

 

This article is sponsored by Westbury Manor, a Brides of Long Island Preferred Venue!

You want to look and feel your best on your big day. Here are the best places for bridal beauty prep in Nassau County, Long Island!

Your engagement is a time to pamper yourself. Trust us — get the facials, get the spa treatments, and take every opportunity to indulge in a little self-care! The more time you take to prep for your wedding day, the better you will feel when it comes time to walk the aisle. 

If you’re a western Long Island BOLI (or you’re willing to drive!), check out 5 of the best places for bridal beauty prep in Nassau County. 

• MORE: The Best Wedding Venues in Nassau County

Beauty Luxe Skin and Body: Plastic Surgery of New York
Great Neck

Working in healthcare for 10 years prepared owner and practitioner Stephanie to give the best experience to her brides and their bridal parties. She offers a variety of services including enhanced lip dermal fillers, Botox, laser hair removal, & laser skin tightening, and lymphatic massages.

4 Ever Young Cosmetic Injectables
Albertson, in-home appointments

Amanda Handel worked in several medical fields, but found a passion in the cosmetic world.  Working out of We Drive Health in Albertson and also traveling to brides’ homes, she truly enjoys helong people and making them feel their greatest. 

The Bronzed Bar Inc
Bellmore

Nura NYC LLC
Rockville Centre

The name “Nura” comes from an Arabic word meaning light or radiance — a reflection of founder Carolyn’s belief that true beauty begins from within and shines outward. She’s trained in everything from advanced body contouring and waxing to lymphatic massage and holistic skin therapies, blending science and self-care into each service. 

• MORE: Nassau, Suffolk and beyond — Ring Leader makes stress-free weddings possible

These beautiful sites in Suffolk County are sure to make your engagement photos special.

Long Island is filled with so many beautiful places to take engagement photos. And we know that with all of the wedding planning you’ve got going on, the thought of finding a location for an engagement shoot is the last thing on your mind.

Sometimes your photographer will have a suggestion for you. But if they don’t and you have no idea where to start, don’t worry! Long Island, specifically Suffolk County, is filled with hidden gems and beautiful grounds. From parks to fields, below are seven places to take engagement photos in Suffolk County.

Sites That Require a Permit

Argyle Park
Located in Babylon, this park has a lake and a beautiful waterfall, making for a great backdrop for all your photos. If you’re a Babylon Village resident, there is no fee. If you’re not a resident, there is a $100 fee. Either way, you need to fill out a permit application to take photos here. Call the Babylon Village Hall at (631) 669-1500 for more information.

Bayard Cutting Arboretum
This ‘museum of trees’ is filled with spots to make your photo session memorable. There is a $250 fee for 1.5 hours on the grounds. There is also an $8 fee to park. Photo sessions start at 11 a.m., with the last one starting at 2 p.m., and are first-come, first-serve. Click here to download the permit application.

• MORE: 7 Best Places to Take Engagement Photos in Nassau County

Lake Ronkonkoma
The lake and view is perfect for fall photos. Since it is a Suffolk County park, there could be a fee and a permit might be required. You can find out more information here.

Sunflower Fields
The East End has great farms, so why not check out a sunflower field for your engagement photos? Waterdrinkers Farm allows photos for a small fee of $25/hour. Click here for more information.

Sites Do Not Require a Permit

Islip Grange Park
Located in Sayville, this park might be the perfect location for you. It has historic buildings, such as a church and a barn, a field and more. And the best part, you don’t need a permit and there is no fee to take photos here.

• MORE: How to Not Feel Awkward During Your Wedding Photos

Lighthouse at Robert Moses
This western-most point of Fire Island offers almost five miles of beach, beautiful, hidden paths and, of course, the lighthouse. Since this is a state park, you shouldn’t need a permit, but you could pay parking fees. You can click here for more information.

Port Jefferson
From the small beaches to the docks and shops along Main Street, downtown Port Jeff or ‘Down Port,’ is a great place to take photos. You shouldn’t need a permit, but make sure you aren’t on private property along the shore. Click here for more info.

If you’re still at a loss, don’t want to pay a fee or don’t want to get a permit, get creative! Perhaps you, a family member or friend have a large yard. Maybe you live near a park or trail where you can take photos. You could even check with your wedding venue and see if you can use their grounds during off hours for your engagement photos. Or think back to a place where maybe you met your spouse – your favorite bar, bowling alley – and take pictures there.

No matter where you go, remember to just have fun and enjoy this time together!

BOLI Preferred Venue The Old Field Club offers picturesque charm and unparalleled service

When it comes to choosing the perfect Long Island wedding venue, couples dream of a place that feels timeless, romantic, and uniquely theirs. Nestled along the picturesque waters of Long Island’s North Shore, BOLI Preferred Venue The Old Field Club in East Setauket is exactly that — a private and award-winning venue that offers breathtaking waterfront views, personalized service and an “exclusively yours” experience that makes every wedding unforgettable.

• MORE: 6 Things You Don’t Have to Include on Your Registry Anymore

One Wedding at a Time

At The Old Field Club, the whole team ensures that your love story is the only story that matters. Unlike larger venues that may host multiple weddings in one day, The Old Field Club has a proud tradition of hosting just one wedding at a time. This exclusivity means you and your guests will enjoy the full attention of the Private Club’s Executive Team, ensuring every detail runs seamlessly.

From your first planning meeting to your last dance, you’ll feel the difference that personalized, attentive service makes.

The Beauty of a Waterfront Wedding

Outdoor ceremonies at The Old Field Club are truly magical. Imagine exchanging vows surrounded by the sparkling waters of the North Shore as your backdrop!

For couples who prefer an indoor setting, the elegant ballroom offers a rustic yet refined space, complete with wood-beamed ceilings, glistening chandeliers, a working fireplace and French doors that open to a waterside deck. Rain or shine, every couple has a picture-perfect ceremony option.

Rustic Charm Meets Timeless Elegance

Brides searching for a venue that blends rustic charm with modern elegance will fall in love with The Old Field Club. With its versatile spaces like the charming Lagoon Room for cocktail hour to the tastefully restored ballroom, every space offers the perfect canvas to bring your wedding vision to life. Whether your style is classic and romantic, modern and chic, or somewhere in between, The Old Field Club adapts beautifully to your theme.

• MORE: 39 Questions to Ask When Touring a Venue

A Culinary Experience to Remember

Food is always one of the most memorable parts of any wedding and The Old Field Club delivers an exceptional dining experience. Couples work with the Club’s culinary team to design menus that reflect their style, from cocktail hour hors d’oeuvres to decadent plated dinners and late-night treats.

Guests can also enjoy premium bar service, including top-shelf spirits, curated wines, and champagne toasts. Every bite is prepared with care, ensuring your wedding is remembered as much for the dining as for the dancing.

5 Reasons Why Brides Love The Old Field Club

• EXCLUSIVITY – ONE WEDDING, ONE LOVE STORY.
  At The Old Field Club, you’ll never share your day with another couple. Our team is dedicated entirely to you, giving your wedding the focus and attention it deserves. From your arrival to your last dance, your love story is the only one being celebrated.
• LOCATION – A WATERFRONT OASIS.
  Nestled on Long Island’s stunning North Shore, the Club offers breathtaking water views that create the perfect backdrop for unforgettable moments and photographs you’ll treasure forever.
• VERSATILITY – SPACES THAT MATCH YOUR VISION.
  Whether you dream of an outdoor ceremony surrounded by nature, an elegant ballroom reception, or both, The Old Field Club offers flexible indoor and outdoor options that ensure your day feels perfectly yours.
• CUISINE – DINING DESIGNED AROUND YOU.
  The Old Field Club’s highly acclaimed culinary team uses the freshest seasonal ingredients to craft menus that are as memorable as they are delicious. Every dish is thoughtfully prepared to reflect your taste and vision. From elegant hors d’oeuvres to multi-course dinners and decadent desserts, your guests will experience the perfect blend of flavor, presentation and hospitality.
• CHARM & ELEGANCE – RUSTIC ROMANCE MEETS TIMELESS STYLE.
  With its combination of warm, rustic character and sophisticated detail, The Old Field Club is the perfect balance of cozy intimacy and elevated elegance. It’s a venue that feels both welcoming and unforgettable.

Plan Your Wedding at The Old Field Club

Your wedding day should be a once-in-a-lifetime experience in a setting as unforgettable as your love story. At The Old Field Club, that dream becomes reality.

Private tours are available by appointment only and dates for 2026 are already filling quickly.

If you’re a bride-to-be searching for the perfect Long Island wedding venue, discover the beauty and exclusivity of The Old Field Club — your hidden gem on the North Shore where memories are made to last a lifetime.

• MORE: Plan your wedding with Ring Leader

In Brides of Long Island’s Monthly “Mrs.” series, we profile some of our members’ unforgettable weddings. This month, we spoke with Victoria Elizabeth about working with her friends to bring her glam wedding to life.

Victoria Elizabeth, founder of BOLI Preferred Vendor Victoria Elizabeth Official, has spent her career making brides look their very best on their wedding day. But on April 27, 2025, it was her turn to sit in the makeup chair and say ‘I do.’ And she made sure to do it up big – working with her best friend Kristin from Eventful Days, she planned the beautiful glam wedding of her dreams.

Judged By His Heart

Victoria and Taylor met online in 2020. He was living in Texas and eight years her junior, and she was in New York. “I originally didn’t think it could work out,” she said. “But then he said to me, ‘Don’t judge a man by his appearance or age, judge him by his heart.’ So I gave him a shot.” After a year of long-distance conversations, Taylor moved to Long Island to be with her. “It was a bit of a culture shock for him, but he became a New Yorker pretty quickly,” Victoria said. “He even picked up a New York accent!”

Four years later, Taylor proposed in the most meaningful way. On his first visit, Victoria took him to Montauk Manor where they sat on a hill. He asked her to be his girlfriend, promising that one day he’d return to that same spot to ask her to be his wife. “It seemed like a trick though, because we go there every year,” she said. “Last year was different though, when he pulled out a ring, making good on his promise.” And when she said yes, her parents emerged from the Montauk Manor to celebrate the moment.

• MORE: 6 Reasons Why You Should Hire a Wedding Planner

Nine Months to Plan

The couple wasted no time diving into wedding planning. “Once we got engaged, my first call was to Kristin,” said Victoria. “She immediately sprang into action, bringing her signature expertise and passion to every detail.” Together they curated a dream team of vendors, including Heather Pauline Photography, a fellow BOLI Preferred Vendor, who got to know Victoria and Taylor as a couple so she could shape the visual storytelling of their day. From engagement shoots in Miami to intimate moments on Long Island, Heather’s work became a cornerstone of the celebration.

When it came to choosing a venue, Peconic Bay Yacht Club was an obvious choice. “It’s one of Kristin’s favorites, and I’m a preferred vendor there,” Victoria said. “Plus, I had been to several weddings there, and I knew it could be transformed to our style.” While Taylor’s love of the water made the location feel personal, Victoria’s vision leaned full glam. With Kristin’s guidance and the support of venue directors John and Hillary, they brought the elegance of the Plaza Hotel to the East End. From luxe florals to elevated design choices, the result was a dazzling departure from the venue’s typical rustic charm.

• MORE: What is a Wedding Content Creator and Should You Hire One?

The Glam Effect

To bring their vision to life, Victoria transformed the Peconic Bay Yacht Club from top to bottom. “We brought in everything, the tables, chairs, napkins, glasses, silverware. If I could have brought in the chandelier, I would have,” she laughed. A custom bar and photo station added personalized flair, and every detail was curated to reflect their glamorous aesthetic. “It was a white box—we got rid of everything Peconic had and made it our own.” 

Victoria and Taylor also added some meaningful details into the wedding that reflected their personalities and love story. Guests were greeted with signature drinks – Victoria’s favorite, a dirty martini dubbed the “Dirty V,” and an energy drink, a nod to Taylor’s alcohol-free lifestyle. Each cocktail napkin featured a Bible verse about love, adding a heartfelt layer to every toast. And the couple leaned into an Italian-inspired vibe, complete with a Frank Sinatra-style singer. 

On Cloud Nine – Literally

For Victoria, the ceremony held profound meaning. “I had a very hard time meeting someone, I never thought it would happen,” she shared. She carefully chose the songs and set the tone for a moment that felt more spiritual than scripted. “I just wanted whatever was going to happen to happen,” she said. As she walked down the aisle on the balcony at Peconic Bay Yacht Club, emotion washed over her. “I felt like someone was carrying me in a cloud. I was crying, and I just felt like God was saying, ‘I’m giving you what I promised you,’” she said. “And then when a gust of wind lifted my veil over Taylor’s head, it looked so beautiful. When you look back on the pictures, my veil covers him, and it looks like the two becoming one. It was such a surreal, divine moment.”

Having the Right People

Her picture perfect wedding day wouldn’t have been possible without her powerhouse team of vendors, many of whom she’s proud to call friends. From Heather Pauline’s deeply personal photography to Kristin’s seamless planning, every detail was executed with heart. Vincent Salvatore crafted a cake that mirrored Victoria’s vision, while Gino from Dolce & Gelato, a BOLI Preferred Vendor, added a whimsical touch by dressing in a cannoli costume when it came time to serve the dessert. And at BOLI Preferred Vendor Bridal Reflections, Victoria found her perfect Galia Lahav gown in a moment of serendipity – one that made her feel radiant, emotional and deeply connected to her grandmother. “They all stood out for very good reasons,” she said. “It’s so hard to pick just one that made the day.”

• MORE: What you feel when you find THE dress

As a beauty professional in the wedding industry, Victoria had a unique advantage during her planning process: her own clients. “If I wasn’t in the business, I wouldn’t have even known what to ask,” she admitted. During makeup trials, she’d turn the tables and ask her brides for tips. “One girl told me about ring boxes for the detail shots, and other small touches I hadn’t considered,” said Victoria. “My fellow brides really helped me think through the details.”

Now with her dream day behind her, Victoria wants to remind brides about the importance of surrounding yourself with the right people. “Having the right people beside you makes all the difference. If someone’s bringing negative energy, don’t include them,” she said. “This day is about you and your husband. Protect that joy. You deserve to feel completely supported and loved.”

Vendors:
Venue: Peconic Bay Yacht Club
Photographer: Heather Pauline Photography, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
Videography: AJ Ingoglia Wedding Films
DJ: Mystical Entertainment Group
Florist: Pedestals Floral Decorators
Hair/Makeup: Victoria Elizabeth Official, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
Dress: Bridal Reflections, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
Cake: Vincenzo Salvatore Cakes
Tuxedos: B2Bespoke
Planner: Kristin and Jahniece at Eventful Days
Content Creator: So Bridal Social
Custom Backdrop: LitBarNYC
Rentals: Luxe Event Rentals and The Finishing Touch NY, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
Invitations: Harley Blue Design NY
Cannoli King:  Dolce & Gelato, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
Headpiece: Christie Lauren Headpieces

Ready to pop the question? Here are a few ways to make your proposal special.

BOLI, this one is for your future spouse 😉

You’ve been wanting to propose for a while, and you want to make it special. Getting on one knee is great and everything, but you really want to wow your (hopefully) future fiancé, and create a memory they’ll share with their loved ones for the rest of their lives.

Fortunately, there are plenty of ways to make the moment stand out! Here are 8 unique ideas for your proposal.

• MORE: Should You ‘Hard Launch’ or ‘Soft Launch’ Your Engagement?  

1. Live Music

Can you imagine how romantic it would be to pop the question with a live violinist, or a string quartet, or even a guitarist providing a beautiful soundtrack? Live musicians like BOLI Preferred Vendor Sweet Harmony can enrich your proposal with, well, sweet harmonies! They’ve even got a live music guide for marriage proposals, so you can select the right melodies for the moment. 

2. Involve friends and family

You know everyone is going to be over the moon once they hear the news, so let them in on things right from the start! Make them a part of your proposal by asking them to hold up signs, bring your future fiancé to that “perfect” spot on the beach, or pop out and yell “surprise!” after the inevitable “yes!”

3. Revisit one of your special places…

Where did you first meet your future fiancé? A bar, a ballpark, a gas station? It doesn’t matter where that place is, it holds special meaning for the both of you. Choosing the place where it all began is a wonderful way to make your proposal special, and brings your love story full circle.

4. …or choose a new place you’ll always remember

Maybe your future fiancé has always wanted to go to France. Or maybe they’re dying to hike a scenic route upstate! Or maybe a peaceful beach in Aruba is more their speed. If they’ve been mentioning a location they’ve always wanted to visit, it might be the perfect opportunity to cement that place into your histories. 

5. Create a scavenger hunt

Does your future fiancé love solving mysteries and traveling around town? A scavenger hunt is a fun and active way to pop the question! Just make sure you have someone guarding the ring at the final location.

• MORE: How Much Should You Spend on an Engagement Ring

6. A surprise within your routine

You know that Saturday mornings mean coffee in bed together. Serve your future fiancé’s coffee with a side of diamond (or opal, or emeralds, or sapphires…you get the picture). Popping the question when they least expect it will create a moment they’ll never forget.

7. Incorporate their hobbies

Is your future fiancé a crossword addict? Let them know about this brand new, super fun puzzle you found. The theme will lead to wedding bells! Think about their interests and hobbies, and find a way to propose using their favorite pastimes. 

• MORE: 9 Engagement Ring Stones That Aren’t Diamonds

8. Recruit your furry friend

Your dog or cat (or even your hamster!) is part of your family. Let them in on the festivities too! Tying the ring around your fur babies collar will save your knees from a few scrapes, as long as they don’t tend to outrun their leash!

• MORE: Popped the question? Time to start planning! Download Ring Leader and make things easy

 

 

Choosing the right wedding officiant can make or break your ceremony.

If you’re not getting married in a religious institution, you may need to find an officiant who can legally marry you. Choosing the right wedding officiant can be tough, as they will set the pace for your ceremony and the start of your wedding. So, you’ll want to find the perfect one who jives with you and your future spouse. But do NOT stress! Brides of Long Island has 10 of the best Long Island wedding officiants for you to choose from.

LI Officiant
Michele LaRosa works with couples from any and all backgrounds. She works with each couple to create the perfect ceremony, as she knows it sets the tone for the whole day. She loves to create ceremonies that showcase and honor each couple’s story.

Personalized Weddings by Rev. Bill
Rev. Bill prides himself on writing and performing personalized wedding ceremonies that focus on the couple. He even officiated his son’s wedding!

• MORE: 14 Questions to Ask When Hiring an Officiant

Long Island Wedding Officiants
Long Island Wedding Officiants, formerly Officiants at Church of Ancient Ways, was founded in 1997 by Pastor April. Together with Rev. Joe, they lead an amazing team of wedding officiants. They never say no, as they will create any type of ceremony for all couples.

NY Officiants
With over 23 years experience in the wedding industry, Minister Christopher has officiated hundreds of weddings. Growing up in the industry, he has worked for entertainment companies as a master of ceremonies and even a wedding event coordinator. But Christopher believes officiating couples’ weddings is his true calling – and he can’t wait to connect to share in your special day.

• MORE: How to Change Your Last Name on Long Island

Rabbi Brian Denker
Rabbi Brian is an independent rabbi and Interfaith lifecycle officiant. He has extensive experience working with couples and families from all walks of life that identify as Jewish, Interfaith, LGBTQA+ and more who are looking to celebrate their one-of-a-kind relationships.

Rabbi Sara Shonfeld
Sara Shonfeld is an ordained rabbi and interfaith officiant. She was born and raised in Israel, and has been officiating Jewish, interfaith, spiritual, civil and intercultural ceremonies on Long Island for more than 10 years. She believes being part of a couples’ journey and special day is an honor, and works with you to create a custom ceremony that includes your personal love story.

TAG Studio – Quintessence Ministry
Russ Camarda established Quintessence Ministry to recognize the union of two souls as an incredibly sacred event. Quintessence wants to share that special story in a way that is memorable and unique to you and your future spouse. Their officiants are nondenominational, but rather guided by an inclusive spiritual philosophy that honors all faith traditions.

Rabbi Ron Csillag
Rabbi Ron entered the wedding industry with a mission: to help couples create ceremonies that truly reflect their values and personalities. He brings a fresh, personalized approach to every celebration, working closely with each couple as a team. His specialty lies in empowering them to honor their union in a way that feels authentic, meaningful and entirely their own.

Sarah Gutmann Long Island Officiant
Sarah believes your wedding ceremony is a great opportunity to revisit the moments that make up your love story – from the early beginnings to your wedding day. She prides herself on making the ceremony planning process fun, romantic and stress-free, ensuring that it reflects your values, spiritual or non-spiritual needs, traditions and heritage.

Interfaith Jewish Catholic Weddings
Rabbi David Katz and Father Michael Callahan have been officiating interfaith wedding ceremonies for more than 40 years combined. They help couples plan a ceremony that is balanced, heartfelt and personal – and one that is sensitive to all families involved.

Just as with any vendor, you want to make sure you get exactly what you want when you start speaking with officiants. If you are very specific about how you want your ceremony, be sure to ask those questions up front to make sure the officiant can create your dream ceremony.

This article is sponsored by Westbury Manor, a Brides of Long Island Preferred Venue!

Unfortunately, RSVPs aren’t that simple

We all look at our guess list and make predictions on who will actually make it. Aunt Susan and Uncle Jim? Definite yeses. That old sorority sister you’re only inviting because you feel obligated? Probably not.

But every once in a while, our predictions can be way off. Our “definites” end up surprising us by checking the “no” box on our RSVPs. When that happens, sometimes it can feel…well, a little hurtful. Why don’t they want to celebrate your most important day? You made it to their wedding, why can’t they reciprocate?

If you’ve read through your fair share of posts in the Brides of Long Island Facebook group, you’ve probably seen this common lament. And well-meaning fellow brides will often share a popular take:”If they want to come to my wedding, they will.” Meaning if your wedding is important enough, they’ll figure out a way to attend.

Here’s the thing, though — life is rarely, if ever, that black and white. 

• MORE: We’re busting these 3 huge wedding myths

Planning a wedding is a major part of your life, but it isn’t the only part of your life. You have family, work, and friends to think about too. You may even have children or be responsible for an aging parent. You may have pets, you may be juggling several side gigs, you may be dealing with a demanding boss, or you may be trying your best to get out of debt. You may even have health concerns you aren’t sharing with anyone, or you may be struggling with an issue in your relationship.

Those are all possible factors in your guests’ lives, too. As much as we may think we know someone, we don’t know everything going on. You may have a friend or family member that wants to come to your wedding more than anything, but they only have a certain number of days off work and they have to save them for their own purposes. Or they don’t have reliable childcare. Or they can’t swing a cross-country plane ticket, give you a nice wedding gift, and pay their past due credit card bill in the same month. You get the picture.

• MORE: What to Do When Your Guests Don’t RSVP

When you write off a “no” RSVP as someone simply not wanting to attend your wedding, you’re taking their lack of attendance personally when it’s most likely not. They may even feel worse about it than you do! Taking offense will negatively impact your relationship, possibly at a time when they really need your love and support.

What should you do when you get a surprise “no”?

If you’re shocked by an out-of-the-blue decline, take some time to breathe. You don’t want to act on impulse, and you don’t want to say or do something you regret later.

The best course of action is to communicate in a positive, uplifting way. Saying something like “I’m so sorry you can’t make it, but we know you’ll be celebrating with us in spirit” lets them know you’ll miss their presence but you understand that they’ll be thinking of you.

If you’re concerned that something may be wrong, check in on them without demanding answers. Saying something like “I got your RSVP, I’m so sad to see you can’t attend. If you need anything, even just to talk, I’m always here.” They may feel comfortable enough to explain their decline, or they may not. But they’ll definitely know that you care about them.

• MORE: Manage your guest list with Ring Leader