Should You Do a Receiving Line?

They’re a great way to greet all of your guests, but they do take time that could be spent doing other things. So should you do a receiving line?

It’s common wedding etiquette: brides and grooms should greet everyone who attends their wedding. 

But, let’s be real. This is probably the biggest party you’ve ever thrown, with invites extended to people you may only remember from childhood (or not at all). It’s not every day that we’re in the same place as hundreds of our family and friends, and that can be incredibly overwhelming. 

At the same time, you don’t want to totally ignore those who’ve taken the time (and the money) to celebrate with you. It is YOUR day, but it might be a pretty lonely event if you had no guests show up!

One way to solve the greeting dilemma is to do a receiving line. Some couples go this route, and some don’t. Should you?

• MORE: How to Tell Someone They Aren’t Invited to Your Wedding 

What is a receiving line?

A receiving line takes place immediately after the ceremony. You and your spouse walk back down the aisle, wait outside the ceremony space, and greet each guest as they leave the room or building. Your guests may want to take a few moments and offer their congratulations, so a line is formed.

Doing a receiving line isn’t a requirement, for you or your guests. You may choose to move on to pictures, hop in a limo, or do something else immediately after you’ve said “I do.” It’s not a requirement for your guests, either. Some may want to catch you at the party instead, so they’ll skip the line altogether. 

What are the pros of doing a receiving line?

The biggest advantage to doing a receiving line is that it allows you to greet every guest at a dedicated time. There may not be many opportunities to see everyone during the reception (not without forgoing the dance floor or skipping dinner, anyway), so a receiving line gives both you and your guests the chance to focus on each other without the usual wedding distractions.

Also, if you wait until the reception, you’ll be rushing around your venue to say your hellos. With a receiving line, it’s the other way around — your guests come to you. 

• MORE: The Pros and Cons of Wedding Guest Dress Codes

What are the cons of doing a receiving line?

The downside to receiving lines is that they take time — especially if you’ve got a big guest list. Instead of rolling through your photo list, heading off to your venue, or even just spending a few quiet moments with your new spouse, you’ll be hunkered down and talking to everyone as they leave your ceremony. And that can get tiring.

Realistically, you’ll also probably encounter a few guests that want to say a lot more than just a quick “congrats!” This can create a bottleneck effect for guests leaving your ceremony space, potentially causing a bit of chaos and discomfort.

Should you do a receiving line?

As with almost everything wedding-related, the decision over a receiving line comes down to your personal preferences. It’s your day, and you get to decide what’s important. 

If you’ve got a smaller guest list, you’re doing a “first look” and getting a lot of pictures done early, or you just want to enjoy your party without the pressure of table hopping, a receiving line might be the way to go. If you’ve got a hefty guest list, you really want to make your cocktail hour, or you feel awkward having to stand and talk to a lot of people, skipping the receiving line is probably your best option.

If you’re still on the fence, ask your photographer! They’ll have a set timeline they’re sticking to, and they could be the deciding vote one way or the other. 

• MORE: Ring Leader makes wedding planning a breeze

In Brides of Long Island’s Monthly “Mrs.” series, we profile some of our members’ unforgettable weddings. This month, we spoke with Emily about the standout professionals who didn’t just show up for her wedding … they went the extra mile.

Our wedding days wouldn’t be complete without the incredible teams working behind the scenes, and Emily and Ryan were lucky to have vendors who truly poured their hearts into the experience. From her hairstylist to her photographers, each one found small but meaningful ways to make the day smoother, sweeter and even more memorable.

A Love Story By Chance

Emily and Ryan first crossed paths at the dive bar where she worked — a place Ryan rarely visited. “His friends were regulars, but he never really went there,” Emily says. “That one night he did.” They began dating in January 2020, and early on, a winter trip to Lake Placid led them to a quiet covered bridge. Ryan carved their initials into the wood, a simple moment that became their place. “We went back a couple of times because it meant so much to us,” she says.

Three years later, Ryan used that same bridge to ask the biggest question of all. For Emily’s birthday on July 20, 2023, he surprised her with a return trip, complete with a cozy Airbnb and her two best friends waiting to celebrate. He brought her back to the bridge and asked her to take their dog, Harley, down to the water while he “carved Harley’s name next to their initials.” When she walked back up, the wood said ‘Will you marry me?’ “I was so oblivious,” Emily laughs. “I turned around and he was on one knee. It was perfect.”

• MORE: 5 Reasons to Have a Long Engagement

Thoughtful Approach to Planning

Emily always imagined a long engagement, not because she was indecisive, but because she wanted to savor it. “You get married once, hopefully,” she says. “I just wanted to enjoy being engaged and the excitement of it all.” She didn’t dive into planning right away; instead, she waited nearly a year before seriously exploring venues and figuring out what kind of wedding felt right for them.

At first, she and Ryan hoped to marry upstate, where their story began. But after visiting a few places, nothing felt like “the one.” It wasn’t until her aunt encouraged her to look locally that Emily discovered the Three Village Inn, a BOLI Preferred Venue, — a place she’d lived near her whole life without realizing it. “It was so cute and clean, and it just made sense,” she says. Once they booked, planning truly began, starting with the vendors that mattered most to her: videography and photography. “Those were the two things I knew I wanted to invest in so we could look back on everything,” she explains.

Once she found Lumos Wedding Photography, a BOLI Preferred Vendor, through another Three Village Inn bride, everything clicked. “When I met Rachel and Chris, I just loved them,” Emily says. “I wanted photographers I’d actually enjoy spending the whole day with, and they were so personable.” Their engagement session in September only confirmed she’d made the right choice, giving her a preview of the comfort and connection she’d feel on the wedding day.

• MORE: The Estate at Three Village Inn offers unique charm that’s off the beaten path

It’s All in the Meaningful Details

Emily envisioned a vintage, old‑world feel that fit perfectly with the charm of the Three Village Inn. She and Ryan added personal touches everywhere: a booklet of handwritten recipes from their grandparents at each place setting, signature cocktails featuring their pets and playful oversized cutouts of their dogs’ and cats’ faces during the bridal party entrance. She carried tributes to her late grandparents in her bouquet, gave Ryan cufflinks engraved in her handwriting and fulfilled her dream of riding in a vintage car from the church to the venue. The night before the wedding, Ryan surprised her with the leather journal she once wrote in — now filled with years of entries he’d secretly added. “I had no idea he planned to give it to me on our wedding day,” she says. They even used her parents’ 45‑year‑old cake topper and napkins printed with their own handwritten notes.

It was Emily’s vendors who made the day feel effortless. She gives her highest praise to Lumos Photography, especially Rachel, who kept the timeline smooth while still being warm and supportive. “She held my lip gloss, handed me a fan, fixed anything I stressed about. She was just constantly there for me,” Emily says. The Beauty Boys arrived early, brought great energy and delivered makeup her bridal party loved. Her hairstylist, Crystal, went above and beyond when a bridesmaid discovered her dress was the wrong color – she left mid‑morning, visited multiple stores and returned with several options, refusing payment. Emily also loved how seamlessly her videographer worked with the photography team, and their last‑minute content creator kept guests laughing with candid interviews and late‑night clips. “Everyone we worked with genuinely cared,” she says. “They made the day what it was.”

• MORE: 27 Questions to Ask When Choosing a Hair and Makeup Artist

Keeping Things Fun

The Brides of Long Island community was a constant resource throughout Emily’s planning. “Oh my god, I was on there all the time,” she laughs. She used the search bar to look up vendors, get dress‑shopping recommendations and even check tipping guidelines. Now on the other side, her advice is simple: try to turn the stress into joy. “Any time I felt overwhelmed, I reminded myself this is such a happy, exciting time,” she says. “You only do this once, so make it fun. Even if you have to fake it a little, it helps — and the day is amazing no matter what.”

Vendors:
Venue: Estate at Three Village Inn, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
Photographer: Lumos Wedding Photography, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
Videography: Wedding Cinema – Pete Galgano
Content Creator: Stardust Motion & Stills (Florin Harrison)
DJ: Absolute DJ, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
Florist: Village Florist
Hair: Crystal Hair Creations
Makeup: The Beauty Boys
Dress: Blu Rayne Bridal Boutique, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
Cake: Rolling Pin Bakery

Here’s how to communicate your guest list boundaries with honesty and kindness.

You’d think that putting together your wedding guest list would be one of the easier tasks on your planning checklist. But once you start blending families, friends and different people in your life into one spreadsheet, it can quickly become one of the trickiest. 

Maybe you’re keeping your celebration small. Maybe you’re trying to stay within a certain head count. Maybe you’ve grown apart from someone who once felt close. Whatever the reason, it’s your wedding, and you’re allowed to make choices that feel right for you.

Of course, that doesn’t always stop others from having opinions. And sometimes, those opinions come with expectations — whether it’s someone assuming they’ll be invited or a relative insisting you include a distant cousin you barely know. If you find yourself facing one of these uncomfortable moments, here is how to tell someone they aren’t invited to your wedding in a way that sets boundaries and avoids unnecessary drama.

Be Honest

Honesty sets the foundation for a respectful conversation, even when the message is hard to hear. A simple, truthful explanation helps the other person understand your decision without feeling misled or strung along.

Be Direct

Being straightforward prevents confusion and avoids giving someone false hope about an invitation that isn’t coming. Clear, gentle wording keeps the moment brief, kind and much less emotionally draining for both of you.

• MORE: How to Cut Your Wedding Day Guest List

Lead With Gratitude

Starting with appreciation helps soften the message and acknowledges the relationship you share. Even a simple “Thank you for wanting to celebrate with us” can make the conversation feel more thoughtful and less abrupt.

Use “We” Language When You Can

Saying “we decided” or “we’re keeping things small” makes the decision feel shared and less personal. It also helps shift the focus to the wedding itself rather than the relationship.

Blame the Logistics, Not the Relationship

Sometimes the truth is that your venue or budget simply won’t allow for everyone. Framing it around logistics helps the other person understand that the decision isn’t a reflection of your feelings toward them.

• MORE: This Isn’t a BBQ, No You Cannot Bring a Guest

Keep It Short and Simple

You don’t need a long explanation — in fact, too much detail can make things more uncomfortable. A clear, kind statement keeps the moment respectful and prevents the conversation from spiraling.

Set Boundaries Early

If you know someone might assume they’re invited, gently managing expectations ahead of time can prevent hurt feelings later. A quick, proactive conversation can save you from a much harder one down the road.

Offer Another Way to Celebrate

If it feels right, suggest a coffee date, a post‑wedding get‑together or sharing photos afterward. It shows that even if they’re not at the wedding, you still value the connection.

• MORE: How to Make a Small Wedding Guest List

Stay Calm If They’re Not

Some people may react with disappointment or frustration, and that’s okay. Your role is simply to stay grounded, repeat your boundary kindly, and not absorb their emotions.

Don’t Apologize for Your Guest List

You can be kind without being sorry — your wedding choices don’t require justification. Standing confidently in your decision helps others respect it, too.

• MORE: How to Negotiate Your Guest List with Your Parents

At the end of the day, your guest list is a reflection of the wedding you and your partner want to create — not a measure of anyone’s worth or your commitment to the people in your life. These conversations may feel uncomfortable in the moment, but approaching them with honesty, kindness and confidence ensures you’re protecting your peace and staying true to your vision for the day you’ve been dreaming of.

There are no shortage of great wedding pros, but here’s why you should seek out a BOLI Preferred Vendor

Long Island weddings are notoriously epic, and they require lots of talented professionals at the helm. It should come as no surprise that our area is home to some incredible companies and individuals, all dedicated to bringing each bridal vision to life. So, how do you choose who to hire for your big day?

Brides of Long Island Preferred Vendors have that extra “seal of approval” that sets them apart from the crowd. Here are some of the reasons why you should consider hiring a BOLI Preferred Vendor for your wedding day.

• MORE: What is a Brides of Long Island Preferred Vendor?

BOLI Preferred Vendors go through an approval process

Unlike some of the more popular wedding sites, a BOLI Preferred Vendor can’t just decide they want to be listed and create a profile. Each BOLI Preferred Vendor goes through a thorough application and approval process conducted by our BOLI staff. 

When a vendor expresses interest in becoming a part of our community, we delve deep into their history, their practices, their reviews, and their materials. We research what your fellow brides have said about their experiences with each company, how they work with peers in their field, and how they operate day-to-day. BOLI has a strict set of standards that we require each vendor to not only meet, but exceed. If we feel that a certain business isn’t up to par, they aren’t approved to be Preferred Vendors.

If you navigate to our Preferred Vendor listings, you’ll see a plethora of businesses that have gone through that approval process. These vendors deliver amazing results for their brides continually and consistently, and we’re proud to back them!

BOLI Preferred Vendors are experienced 

One of the main things we look for in a vendor is experience. Brides of Long Island loves to support and encourage new businesses, but at the end of the day, we will only accept vendors that come with experience, passion, professionalism, and expertise. 

Your wedding is one of the most meaningful moments of your life. We need to know that our vendors can do their jobs at a high level, with no stress attached. Our vendors come with a proven track record that we’ve observed time and time again!

• MORE: Announcing the 2026 Brides of Long Island Diamond Award Winners!

BOLI Preferred Vendors come with reviews you can trust

Part of our approval process involves researching what YOU have to say. We look at reviews in our brides-only Facebook group to ensure that each Preferred Vendor has overwhelmingly positive feedback from our community.

With our brides’ permission, we then list those reviews on our own site so that every visitor knows they’re looking a tried and true professional. These are not just anonymous reviews from faceless people you don’t know — reviews on the BOLI site come from REAL clients!

BOLI Preferred Vendors have been hired by your friends and neighbors

Consider the phrase “BOLI Preferred Vendor” like it’s a personal recommendation. Remember, when we welcome a business as a BOLI Preferred Vendor, that means your friends, neighbors, and co-workers have hired these companies themselves. Your college roommate’s amazing DJ, your boss’ gorgeous venue, your next door neighbor’s eye-catching invitations — you’ve seen BOLI Preferred Vendors’ work in action already! 

Well, what are you waiting for? Head over to our BOLI Preferred Vendor profiles, and introduce yourself to your wedding day dream team!

• MORE: Got your vendors? Download Ring Leader to take control of your wedding

This article sponsored by You and Me by the Sea Travel, a Brides of Long Island Preferred Vendor!

Looking for something sparkly? Brides of Long Island’s favorite Long Island Jewelers can answer the call!

You’ve got the diamond (or maybe you’re doing some “research” 😉 ), but now it’s time to go further! Whether you’re looking for your own wedding band, something for your fiancé, or a fun gift for your bridesmaids, you’ll definitely be heading to a jeweler sometime soon.

When you’re dealing with something as special as jewelry, you’ll want to know that you’re working with a pro.  The following are Brides of Long Island’s favorite Long Island jewelers — these are the companies and individuals that are passionate, knowledgeable, and committed to bringing you some outstanding bling!

• MORE: How Much Should You Spend on an Engagement Ring?

Elegant Jewelers by Mike

When Mike first opened up shop in 1985, the vision was (and still is!) for it to be more than just a jewelry store. He believes that jewelry, watches, and diamonds are so much more than just a purchase, they’re experiences. This 4-time BOLI Diamond Award winner specializes in custom design.

Bonded Bracelets

Danielle, the owner of Bonded Bracelets, started off as a hair stylist for her clients’ weddings. She soon transitioned to permanent jewelry, marking special occasions with delicate and meaningful charms! Perfect for bridal showers, bachelorettes, or even mother-daughter gifts, Bonded Bracelets are fully customizable (and re-welds are complimentary!)

Kay Cameron Fine Jewelry

The team at Kay Cameron Fine Jewelry is on a mission to make all of their customers feel like family. As a full-service jewelry store, they have an expert jeweler on premise — which means all repairs and resizing stays in-store! They also do amazing custom design work for that “one of a kind” piece that you envision. 

• MORE: 9 Engagement Ring Stones That Aren’t Diamonds

Aurelle Bond

Aurelle Bond was created with one simple belief in mind: meaningful moments deserve to be celebrated with intention. To owner Lindsy, what matters most is care, quality, and how something makes you feel. Each piece is thoughtfully selected, custom fitted, and professionally placed to be worn with pride and kept as a lasting reminder of a special moment.

From everyday must‑haves to splurge‑worthy upgrades, here’s what to add to your wedding registry – no matter your living situation.

Creating a wedding registry isn’t one‑size‑fits‑all — especially today, when so many couples already live together long before the big “I do.” Maybe your kitchen cabinets are already full, maybe you’ve mastered the art of sharing a bathroom or maybe you’re starting from scratch and need everything. No matter where you fall, your registry is your chance to refresh the basics, upgrade the things you’ve outgrown and add a few special items that you’ve always wanted.

BOLI’s Ultimate Wedding Registry Checklist brings together the essentials, the smart upgrades and the fun “why not?” additions that make building your home feel intentional, exciting and uniquely yours.

Kitchen

A well‑stocked kitchen makes everyday cooking easier and hosting feel effortless. Whether you’re upgrading what you already own or building your collection from scratch, these staples and smart additions belong on every registry:

• High‑quality knife set

• Cutting boards (wood + plastic)

• Nonstick skillet

•  Stainless steel cookware set

•  Dutch oven

•  Baking sheets + cooling racks

• Mixing bowls

• Measuring cups + spoons

• Blender or high‑speed blender

• Food processor

• Toaster or toaster oven

•  Air fryer

•  Rice cooker

•  Electric kettle

• Coffee maker or espresso machine

• Stand mixer

• Storage containers

• Wine glasses + everyday glassware

• Dish towels + oven mitts

BOLI Editor’s Pick: A quality Dutch oven. It’s the one piece you’ll use for everything — soups, roasts, pasta, bread — and it lasts for decades. If you’re going to splurge anywhere in the kitchen, this is the workhorse worth choosing.

• MORE: 8 Registry Mistakes (and How to Avoid Them)

Bedroom

Your bedroom should feel like a retreat — cozy, calm, and tailored to your routines. These items help you build a space that feels restful and elevated:

• Sheet sets (cotton, linen, or sateen)

• Duvet + duvet cover

• Pillows (various firmness levels)

• Mattress topper

• Throw blankets

• Bedside lamps

• Laundry hampers

• Hangers

• Reading light

BOLI Editor’s Pick: A luxe sheet set. High‑quality sheets instantly elevate your sleep routine and make your bedroom feel like a boutique hotel. It’s a small upgrade with a big everyday payoff.

Bathroom

Small upgrades in the bathroom can make your daily routine feel more luxurious. These essentials and comfort‑boosters are worth adding to your registry:

• Plush bath towels + hand towels

• Bath mat

• Shower curtain + liner

• Storage baskets

• Toiletry organizers

• Robes

• Hair tools storage

• Scale

• First‑aid kit

BOLI Editor’s Pick: Plush, hotel-style bath towels. They bring a sense of indulgence to your daily routine and hold up beautifully over time. Guests notice them, too!

• MORE: 6 Things You Don’t HAVE to Include in Your Registry Anymore

Cleaning

Even if you already live together, this is the perfect time to refresh your cleaning tools. These items help keep your home running smoothly and looking its best:

• Vacuum (upright, cordless or robot)

• Mop or steam mop

• Broom + dustpan

• Microfiber cloths

• Laundry baskets

• Iron or steamer

• Lint roller

• Cleaning caddy

BOLI Editor’s Pick: A cordless stick vacuum. Lightweight, powerful and easy to grab for quick cleanups. It’s the kind of upgrade you’ll use constantly without realizing how much it improves your day‑to‑day.

Hosting & Entertaining

Whether you host weekly or only on special occasions, these pieces make gatherings feel polished and effortless. Think of them as the building blocks of your entertaining style:

• Serving platters + bowls

• Charcuterie board

• Cheese knives

• Pitcher or carafe

• Barware set

• Cocktail shaker

• Ice bucket

• Cloth napkins

• Table linen

• Outdoor dinnerware (if applicable)

BOLI Editor’s Pick: A beautiful serving board. Perfect for charcuterie, desserts or last‑minute hosting, it makes any spread look intentional and elevated.

Big‑Ticket Upgrades

These are the items couples often hesitate to buy for themselves, which makes them perfect for a registry. They’re practical, long‑lasting and elevate your home:

• High‑end vacuum or robot vacuum

• Air purifier

• Quality cookware set

• Premium knives

• Smart home devices

• Luggage set

• Patio furniture

• High‑quality mattress

• Upright mixer or specialty appliances

• Big screen television

BOLI Editor’s Pick: A high‑quality mattress. You spend a third of your life on it and upgrading now means years of better sleep. It’s the ultimate “we’d never buy this for ourselves” registry win.

• MORE: What to Expect When Moving in With Your Fiancé

Nice‑to‑Have Luxuries

These aren’t necessities — they’re the fun, indulgent items that make everyday life feel a little more special. Add them guilt‑free:

• Heated blanket

• Fancy candle set

• Espresso machine upgrade

• Wine fridge

• Specialty kitchen gadgets (pasta maker, sous vide)

• Plush throw pillows

• Decorative vases

• High‑end speaker system

BOLI Editor’s Pick: A countertop espresso machine. It turns slow mornings into a ritual and saves you countless coffee runs. A luxury that becomes a daily joy.

Unique & Non‑Traditional Registry Ideas

Not every couple needs more “stuff,” and that’s totally OK. These options let guests contribute to experiences, future goals or meaningful moments instead:

• Honeymoon fund

• Home renovation fund

• Down payment fund

• Date‑night experiences

• Cooking classes

• Wine club or coffee subscription

• Museum or zoo memberships

• Charitable donations in your name

BOLI Editor’s Pick: A honeymoon fund. Guests love contributing to experiences, and you’ll remember those moments long after the wedding gifts are unwrapped.

Your registry isn’t about checking every box; it’s about choosing the things that will make your new chapter feel a little easier, a little cozier and a lot more fun. Mix the practical with the playful, add a few upgrades you’ve been eyeing and don’t be afraid to dream big. At the end of the day, the best registry is the one that feels like the two of you: thoughtful, joyful and ready for whatever comes next.

This article sponsored by Absolute Entertainment, a Brides of Long Island Preferred Vendor!

 

You’ve seen “Brides of Long Island Preferred Vendor” all over our platforms, but what does that mean? We break it down here.

If you’ve spent anytime on Brides of Long Island’s website, Instagram, or in our brides-only Facebook group, you’ve surely seen it: a wedding pro listed with the distinction of “BOLI Preferred Vendor.”

But…what, exactly is a Preferred Vendor? What puts a bridal makeup artist, venue, or DJ into this category? 

• MORE: BOLI’s Favorite Photographers and Videographers

What is a Brides of Long Island Preferred Vendor?

A Brides of Long Island Preferred Vendor is a wedding professional that is trusted and endorsed by our organization. When you find a BOLI Preferred Vendor on our website, see “BOLI Preferred Vendor” next to an account tag on social media, or see a Brides of Long Island Preferred Vendor window cling on a businesses front door, that means you’re communicating with a professional that we fully back and believe in. We feel that these wedding pros are truly the “best of the best” in our local industry, and have proven time and time again that they’re passionate, professional, and capable of bring your dream wedding day to life.

How are Brides of Long Island Preferred Vendors chosen?

Becoming a Brides of Long Island Preferred Vendor isn’t automatic! Our vendors are chosen through a specific process that involves applications and research. We vet each and every professional that joins our Preferred Vendor roster, which means that the BOLI staff delves into every aspect of their business. We check out brides’ individual feedback on each company, scour through available reviews, and take time to understand what they can offer to our community. 

Not every vendor that applies makes the cut! If we feel a company doesn’t meet our high standards, we do not invite them to become a Brides of Long Island Preferred Vendor. 

• MORE: Brides of Long Island’s Favorite Bridal Salons

What makes a Brides of Long Island Preferred Vendor different than others?

Searching for vendors can be a stressful experience. An online profile or a search engine listing may seem impressive, but how do you really know the person or company you’re looking at is legit?

Brides of Long Island Preferred Vendors are different because they’ve all been vetted by our community. These are businesses that have actually been hired by real life brides for real life weddings in your neighborhood. Think of a BOLI Preferred Vendor as a personal recommendation from a friend!

How do I find and work with Brides of Long Island Preferred Vendors?

The absolute best way to find a Brides of Long Island Preferred Vendor is through our website! Here you will find 26 categories of wedding-related businesses, ranging from venues and photographers to content creators, bridal salons, and even honeymoon specialists. In each category you’ll see our list of Preferred Vendors and their profiles, which go into detail about their companies, their specialities, their inspirations, and their motivations. BOLI Preferred Vendor profiles give you the chance to “meet” your potential vendors before hopping on a call or scheduling a tour. You’ll get a sense of their personalities, their vibe, and whether they’re a good fit for your wedding day team. And since a picture says a thousand words, each Preferred Vendor profile features images of their work!

Aside from our website, you can find Preferred Vendors through our brides-only Facebook group, our Instagram, our monthly newsletter, and our in-person events like the annual Summer Soirée. We feature our Preferred Vendors all the time because we’re proud of what they do, so they’ll always be noted with “BOLI Preferred Vendor” next to their name.

Your big day is in the best hands with a Brides of Long Island Preferred Vendor!

• MORE: Ring Leader ties it all together

Caught up in the newlywed bliss? These questions will help guide you through the moments you didn’t even know to prepare for.

We spend so much time wrapped up in wedding planning, and honestly, it makes sense. But once you’re back from your honeymoon, real life settles in quickly (in all the best ways). As you ease into newlywed life and this brand-new chapter, here are nine questions about marriage you never thought to ask — but definitely should.

How do we handle “invisible labor” in our home?

So much of marriage runs on the tasks no one sees — remembering birthdays, scheduling appointments, keeping the household running. Asking this early helps you divide responsibilities in a way that feels fair and prevents resentment later.

What does “quality time” actually look like for each of us?

You might think it’s date nights, but your partner might think it’s watching TV together. Getting specific about what makes each of you feel connected keeps you from missing each other emotionally.

How do we want to handle conflict when we’re both overwhelmed?

It’s easy to communicate well when life is calm. But deciding on a plan for the stressful moments — a pause word, a cool-down routine or a “no walking away” rule — can save you from spiraling during tough times.

What traditions do we want to keep, and which ones do we want to create?

Marriage blends two histories. Talking about holidays, birthdays and family expectations helps you build a life that feels like yours, not just an extension of your families.

How do we define “fairness” when it comes to money?

Fair doesn’t always mean 50/50. Whether you combine finances or keep things separate, understanding each other’s comfort levels, spending habits and long-term goals sets the tone for financial harmony.

What does support look like when one of us is going through a major life change?

Career shifts, grief, health issues — life will throw curveballs. Knowing how your partner prefers to be supported (space, reassurance, practical help) makes you a stronger team.

How will we protect our relationship when life gets busy?

Between work, kids and responsibilities, it’s easy to drift. Asking this helps you build rituals — weekly check-ins, monthly date nights or even a “no phones after 9” rule — that keep your marriage at the center.

What boundaries do we want with extended family and friends?

From unannounced visits to holiday plans, boundaries matter. Talking about them early prevents misunderstandings and keeps both partners feeling respected and united.

How do we want to keep growing as individuals and as a couple?

Marriage isn’t the finish line — it’s the starting point. Discussing personal goals, shared dreams, and how you’ll support each other’s evolution keeps your relationship dynamic and fulfilling.

As newlywed life unfolds, you’ll learn so much about each other in real time. Let these questions guide you, ground you and spark the kind of conversations that keep your relationship strong long after the honeymoon glow.

Honeymoon specialist Christine Earls of You and My by the Sea shares a few unique choices for your post-wedding getaway

Many brides of Long Island look forward to their honeymoons even more than their wedding days! After months of planning and lots of work, your honeymoon will be a chance to relax, celebrate, and take in beautiful places in the world.

Christine Earls of BOLI Preferred Vendor, You and Me by the Sea, has curated some incredible itineraries for newlywed couples. And while the word “honeymoon” quite often lends itself to lying on a beach, she suggests considering a few unconventional destinations.

• MORE: You and Me by the Sea by the Sea Curates Your Honeymoon with Distinctive and Luxurious Flair

“It’s a great place for something unique.” – Christine Earls, You and Me by the Sea

If you’re not a beach person, fear not — Christine specializes in planning your honeymoon around your tastes and preferences. 

“There’s more to a honeymoon than the Caribbean,” she said. “One of the destinations I’ve started to book more and more frequently is Iceland. It’s out of the ordinary. It’s not the Caribbean and it’s not Europe. It’s a great place for something unique.”

From the Northern Lights to scenic hikes, Iceland can provide breathtaking surroundings and exciting excursions. “My couples love the majesty and wonder of the Northern Lights, there’s truly nothing like it,” Christine reflected. “I’ve set brides and grooms up with driving tours, amazing accommodations, even a trip to an ice bar! That’s been a huge highlight.”

“You could start your vacation sipping limoncello.” – Christine Earls, You and Me by the Sea

For those looking for something a bit less icy, Christine recommends setting your sights toward Europe. 

“You can never go wrong with Italy,” she said. “There are direct flights to the Amalfi Coast now from JFK, so you could start your vacation sipping limoncello and looking out at the Mediterranean. It’s very beautiful and very romantic.”

“Italy is vast, so you can have a really diverse experience there,” she continued. “You can take day trips to Pazatano or Ravelo, end in Rome and see the Vatican, or head to Florence and stay in a winery. Something my Italy couples always rave about is the olive oil – it’s on another level there! They always bring some back to the States.”

“People don’t realize they’re an option.” – Christine Earls, You and Me by the Sea

Having trouble deciding on the perfect honeymoon destination? Christine has an idea. 

“Cruises are a fantastic way to see so many places in one trip,” she said. “People don’t realize they’re an option. Especially for Greece and Italy. You can arrive early and explore Italy for three days, then embark and Island hop throughout the Greek Isles. Or you can stay after the cruise ends, exploring Athens and seeing the Acropolis.”

“You don’t have to stay in one location.” – Christine Earls, You and Me by the Sea

Perhaps the tried-and-true Caribbean destinations are calling your name. There are still ways to make your trip unique! 

“You don’t have to stay in one location,” Christine said. “I’ve been suggesting Antigua and St. Vincent lately because you can island hop. Lots of opportunities for day trips and exploring some of the lesser-visited locations.”

While classic destinations the Maldives will always be popular, Christine noted that current events are causing some couples to pivot. “Many couples are switching their trips to Bora Bora instead and staying centrally-located. Cruising is also a good option, as there are itineraries that take you through French Polynesia. Again, you don’t have to choose only one location!”

“The truth is, it doesn’t get easier.” – Christine Earls, You and Me by the Sea

Christine had a few words of wisdom for Long Island brides planning their post-wedding getaways. “The truth is, it doesn’t get easier,” she explained. “Once you have a family, traveling becomes difficult if not impossible. And even if you are able to travel, you have to consider your children in whatever you do. So now’s the time to take the trip you’ve always wanted to take.”

Understanding the realistic costs is also important. “I work with all budgets, but if you tell me your ideal vacation is a week on the Amalfi Coast and four nights in Sicily and you only have $2000 to spend, unfortunately it isn’t going to work.”

Wedding planning takes up a lot of energy and time. You and Me by the Sea takes the stress of planning your honeymoon off the table, and allows you to fully enjoy every aspect of your vacation!

• MORE: Ring Leader takes the stress away

In Brides of Long Island’s Monthly “Mrs.” series, we profile some of our members’ unforgettable weddings. This month, Emily talks about how planning her wedding in two years led to the perfect day.

Learning from her sisters’ experiences, Emily knew from the moment she got engaged that she wanted to take her time. She told her now‑husband Donny that waiting a couple of years would allow them the space to plan intentionally, giving them a better chance at securing the best vendors for their July 4, 2025 wedding.

A Different Online Dating Story

Emily and Donny’s love story began in an unexpected way. “We actually met during COVID,” Emily says. With her senior‑year internship in Greece canceled, she signed up for a virtual course her mom found, never imagining her future husband was logging in from South Carolina at the same time. 

They spent that summer texting and FaceTiming for three months straight, building a connection before they ever met in person. When they finally met that fall, everything clicked. They started dating immediately, and once Donny graduated, he moved to New York. “Two years later, we were engaged,” she says.

For the proposal, Donny chose a spot that held quiet meaning for them — a tiny stretch of beach in the Huntington Bay area they’d stumbled upon early in their relationship. “It was this random place on the water we visited once, and we didn’t even know it was someone’s property,” Emily laughs. Before proposing, he wrote a letter to the homeowners asking permission to return. On the first day of summer after a lunch in Northport, he drove her back to that little beach to propose. “It was so sweet and so well thought out,” she says.

Plenty of Time to Plan

With two full years ahead of them, Emily and Donny jumped into planning almost immediately. “The week after we got engaged, I told Donny we should start with the big vendors,” Emily says. After watching both her sisters navigate the post‑COVID wedding backlog, she knew early booking would give them the best chance at securing the dates and people they wanted — especially with her teaching schedule. 

They planned to tour a few venues, but started with Larkfield since it was close to home and already a familiar place from her family’s celebrations. “We just fell in love with it,” she says. “The staff was so lovely, the space was beautiful, and July 4th was still open. Once we saw the garden and the big room, we canceled the other tours. We signed that week.”

With the venue locked in, they turned their attention to photography and videography – the next most important vendors for both of them. But finding the right style proved trickier than expected. 

“We were looking for someone with a warm, natural look, and it was hard to find that in our price range,” Emily explains. Many photographers were also unavailable for July 4th, but she appreciated how gracious they were. “A lot of them said, ‘I don’t work on the Fourth, but here’s a list of colleagues with a similar style,’ which I thought was so classy.” 

That’s how they discovered Bernard Alexis Photography, a BOLI Preferred Vendor. “As soon as I saw his Instagram, I loved his work. It was a bonus that he’d photographed so many weddings at Larkfield,” she says. After a call that August, they felt instantly comfortable and booked him right away.

Quiet Moments By the Water

Emily describes the wedding day as a beautiful blend of tradition, emotion and a few quiet moments she and Donny will never forget. “The church ceremony was so special for us,” she says. 

After their Greek Orthodox service, they stayed behind to take family photos before slipping away for something rare on a wedding day — time alone. “Our bridal party went to Larkfield, but Donny and I went to Northport Harbor with Bernard and our videographer,” she explains. “It was the only 40 minutes of the day that we were really alone together, and it felt perfect.” Those waterfront portraits ended up being some of her favorites. “I don’t think we would’ve gotten those moments if we didn’t go down to Northport,” she says. “It was exactly what we needed before the party started.”

When it came to vendors, Emily says she couldn’t have asked for a better team. “Bernard was amazing from the very beginning. He knew exactly what he was doing, and his photos are incredible,” she says. Their DJ, BodyRock, kept the energy high all night. “There wasn’t a single low point. They matched our families’ energy perfectly.” And her makeup artist, Glam by Jane Erica, left a lasting impression. “She was unbelievable,” Emily says. “She made everyone look amazing, especially the older women in my family.” Jane and her team even stayed late to do Emily’s grandmother’s makeup as a last-minute add-on. “She went above and beyond,” Emily adds. “Honestly, every vendor did. We didn’t have a single negative experience.”

Give Yourself Time

Emily says the Brides of Long Island Facebook group became one of her most valuable planning tools. “I searched for almost everything,” she says, adding that she even found a Larkfield‑specific subgroup that helped her with venue‑related questions. “People thought of things I never would’ve considered — even what to wear the morning of the wedding. Everything was in that group.” 

Her biggest advice for future brides is to give themselves time. “I planned everything myself because I’m a teacher and I love being organized,” she says. “Having two years made the whole process enjoyable. We never felt overwhelmed because we could spread everything out.” She encourages other brides to do the same if they can. “Give yourself time so you can enjoy being engaged and enjoy planning. It doesn’t have to be stressful. It can actually be such a positive experience.”

Vendors:
Venue: Larkfield
Photographer: Bernard Alexis Photography, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
DJ: BodyRock
Florist: Nicole Link Designs
Hair: Galatia Moda
Makeup: Glam by Jane Erica
Dress: Bridal Salon of Huntington, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
Tuxedos: Bonaventure Tuxedos