“This is a once-in-a-lifetime moment, so you want to get it right.” You and Me by the Sea turned this BOLI’s dream destination wedding into a reality

Christine Earls of You and Me by the Sea recounts the epic experience of planning BOLI Jessica Alfano’s Grecian nuptials

Every bride will have a different vision for their wedding – some want days a little closer to home, and some want to celebrate with the Santorini sky in the background. The latter was true for Bride of Long Island Jessica Afano. 

So when it came time to plan all the exciting details of her destination wedding in Greece, Jessica decided to seek expert guidance from Christine Earls, owner of BOLI Preferred Vendor You and Me by the Sea. 

Matching her visions

Jessica’s epic Santorini vows were born with an extensive consultation. “Jess, [her fiancé] Cameron and I sat down and discussed what their expectations were, and what their visions for their wedding day would be,” Christine remembered. “I had them describe what their absolute perfect day would look like, and as they spoke, the wheels started turning in my head on how to bring it all to fruition.”

While learning about Jessica’s vision was an important aspect of this initial meeting, it was also an opportunity for Christine to explain the marriage process in another country. “There were lots of legalities for her wedding in Greece that she needed to know about, and a lot of different things you have to do in order to be legally married there. So I was able to explain that process and go over their options before we even started to book things.” 

Insider insight

After their meeting, Christine leapt into action. “I work hand-in-hand with local wedding planners in Santorini, and those wedding planners work hand-in-hand with the best professionals in the area – photographers, videographers, everyone,” she explained. “These aren’t fly-by-night vendors, or someone you’d just randomly find on social media, they’re reputable pros that have a proven track record.”

She went on to illustrate how important it is to work with professionals you can trust. “Vendors that have a good working relationship is like its own kind of marriage, and it’s so crucial on your wedding day. This is a once-in-a-lifetime moment, so you want to get it right. Jessica’s not going back to Greece to do this again. You want to know you can trust the people you’re working with to deliver fully when it’s go-time.”

Elevating her experience

Once the basic plans were in place, Christine began to look for ways to make Jessica’s escapades even more meaningful. “What I really enjoyed was being able to elevate the experience for her,” she described. “I wanted to add a few special touches that could bring in even more luxury during this exciting time  – I arranged for champagne in their room, with a small cake to celebrate the start of their new chapter. I had charcuterie delivered. When she checked in, there was a bouquet of flowers waiting for her.”

Christine even enhanced Jessica’s dream lodging. “She wanted to stay in a really nice resort, and I was able to get her a room with an incredible view of the ocean and a private pool, which was even better than what she originally had in mind.”    

It’s all in the details

Jessica’s vision proved to be exceptionally inspiring for Christine. “Jessica wanted the backdrop of her wedding ceremony to be the Mediterranean Sea, on a cliff,” she said. “That whole idea really excited me. I mean, it sounds like a scene in a movie, doesn’t it?”

That excitement spread as she solidified all the details. “Knowing that that was her vision helped to focus my efforts and attention in the right places and with the right people, and it helped to bring in the details that would contribute to that overall look of her day.” 

Why hiring a destination wedding travel agent is key

It goes without saying that destination weddings involve coordinating complicated logistics, and it’s important to have a knowledgeable and experienced professional help you get all the puzzle pieces into place. “Planning a destination wedding is a full-time job,” Christine described. “Wedding planning in general is overwhelming, but destination weddings have their own separate set of challenges on top of everything else. Picking out your flatware over a Zoom meeting is a lot different than doing it in person. Having grandma drive down the block to a catering hall is different than getting her on an international flight. You should be enjoying your time as an engaged couple and not stressing over the thousands of things you have to do in order to pull off a wedding away from home.”

Christine also stressed that proper vetting is essential. “I just got off of a consult call with a woman who got married in the Caribbean, and her wedding day was ruined,” she recounted. “There was a hurricane and everything got rained out, but worse than that is the photographer she hired – someone she found off of Instagram –  did not get one good picture. All of their photos were terrible, out of focus, arms flying everywhere, you name it. A destination wedding travel agent will vet all of your vendors, so you can be confident that everyone knows what they’re doing.” 

Finally, Christine highlighted the often-tricky legal aspects of getting married in a different country – and that sometimes, vital information can be difficult to find. “Each country has their own rules, and it’s important that you understand their rules. Some countries will let you get married as soon as you land, some will only let you get married after you’ve been there for a few days. Even the definition of what a ‘day’ is can be different in each country.” 

“Knowing the ins and outs of these laws is not something you can just Google,” she continued. “You have to know who to talk to, and who is going to give you accurate information. A destination wedding travel agent will know these answers.” 

Vendors

Travel agent: You and Me by the Sea (a BOLI Preferred Vendor)

Greece Wedding planner: Marry Me in Greece

Venue: Andromeda Villas

Photographer: Kapetanakis Studios

Hair and Makeup: Victoria Doris

Dress: North Fork Bridal Shoppe (a BOLI Preferred Vendor)

Alterations and custom veil: Meredith Gill Designs

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In Brides of Long Island’s Monthly “Mrs.” series, we profile some of our members’ unforgettable weddings. This month, we spoke with Deon Araya about how she kept some Nigerian traditions during her big day.

When Deon Araya met her husband Jason in eighth grade, they never imagined they’d one day be married. In fact, she says they never even dated in middle school or high school, just stayed good friends. Fifteen years later, the pair planned their wedding that honored their cultures in the most elegant night.

A Chance Train Ride

Deon and Jason sort of lost touch as they each went off to different colleges – him in Rhode Island and her upstate. In 2019, Deon took the LIRR home to Freeport. As she struggled with her luggage to cross Sunrise Highway, little did she know that Jason was working across the street from the train station. “When I got home, I had a DM from him on Instagram, asking if it was me running across the highway,” she said. “He had seen the whole thing! But that was how we reconnected.”

They started dating shortly after that encounter. And in January 2022, Jason proposed. “Since it’s very hard to surprise me, Jason prepped our family members with what to say to me leading up to the proposal.” They were supposed to be going out for his mother’s birthday, but when she got to the restaurant, no one was inside. “When I went upstairs, there was a line of rose petals and Jason was waiting at the end with balloons asking ‘Will you marry me?’” After he proposed, the birthday party turned into their engagement party.

MORE: Summer Soiree? Fall Fête? A Breakdown of Weddings by Season. 

Hit the Ground Running

Deon and Jason started planning their wedding immediately after they got engaged. “My parents are old fashioned and told us they wanted us to be married by the following summer.” So by the end of January 2022, they had booked the Watermill, a BOLI preferred vendor, for their Aug. 19, 2023 wedding. “We actually found the Watermill by chance. We were coming back from another venue, and I read a review of the Watermill online. They were able to give us a tour that day, and I knew when we walked in that was where we were going to be married.”

After booking the Watermill, Deon and Jason started looking for a photographer, as photos were the most important to them. When the original photographer they liked was booked on their date, they recommended Heather from Never There Yet Photography, a BOLI preferred vendor. “Heather is just a sweetheart. To me, she was more than just a vendor, she was like a friend on my wedding day – helping to calm my nerves and making me feel so comfortable.” Deon says that Heather also helped her choose the perfect location for their first look. “She pulled out old portfolios of hers to give us ideas. She was just so patient to make sure we were going to get the vision we wanted on our wedding day.”

As for the other vendors, Deon says she turned to BOLI for lots of reviews. “I relied heavily on BOLI to hear other people’s experiences and tips and tricks for the day of.”

MORE: 36 of the Best Photo & Video Vendors on Long Island

A Joint Effort

Deon says that Jason was very involved in planning. “He was at every vendor meeting, and was just so supportive of the whole process,” she says. “Having him by my side, especially during the most stressful parts like the guest list, was such a relief.” She says they decided on color schemes and the vision for the day together. She believes that is what made their wedding day even more special – and successful. Coming from different cultures – she’s Nigerian and Jamaican and he’s Peruvian and Guatemalan – they were the first in their families to have a big wedding, so being on the same page always helped. Deon adds that if they ever disagreed on something, they were always able to find a middle ground. “For example, my husband is very into anime and he wanted to incorporate it somehow in our wedding,” she explains. “So we had a sign on our DJ booth that was from DragonBallZ. I have no idea what that game is about, but it was an easy compromise for us to come to.”

When it came to a theme, Deon says they went for a classy vibe – sort of a Great Gatsby feel. And it was important to incorporate her Nigerian heritage into the day – so they, along with their parents, changed into traditional African attire. “We also got re-introduced and paraded around the room while our guests threw money on us – which is a tradition in African weddings. It’s a blessing for your marriage.”

MORE: The Pros & Cons of a First Look vs. Meeting at the Altar

Special First Looks

In addition to their private first look, Deon also had a first look with her father. “My dad is a very stoic person, not emotional by any means. So, when I saw tears in his eyes as he saw me in my wedding gown, it was something so special.” And when she saw Jason for the first time? “We always live our life like a movie – so to us – it was such a movie moment that I’ll never forget.”

The rest of the day went so smoothly. Deon says she has her bridal attendant Christina and maitre’d Nick to thank for that. “I felt like if anything did go wrong, I never saw it thanks to them!” She says the staff at the Watermill was just fantastic – everything from making sure Deon and Jason had some private time in their bridal suite to ensuring their day was personalized in every way.

In addition to the fabulous service at the Watermill, Deon says her makeup artist Krystal was also amazing and had a calming effect. “We were running very behind. Krystal not only got my makeup done in 40 minutes, but it was the full glam effect that never smudged the entire night!”

Now that Deon feels like she can plan weddings as a side hustle (as most of us graduated BOLIs do), she wants other brides to remember to stay true to themselves. “At times, people can get criticized for how they want to do things, but honestly, you need to do what you want! It’s your day, you’re allowed to be a little selfish.” At the end of the day, though, she says the most important thing is to remember why you’re getting married. “You’re having this wedding because you’re marrying your soulmate – don’t lose sight of that.”

Vendors:
Venue: The Watermill, a BOLI preferred vendor
Photographer: Heather from Never There Yet, a BOLI preferred vendor
DJ: MC Phil and DJ Mclovin from After Hours
Florist: Dana from Feriani Floral Decorators
Hair: Ruth from RuthiesHairCafe
Makeup: Krystal from Luxe Beauty Brow
Invitations: Invitations by Samantha at the Watermill
Dress: Max Bridal, a BOLI preferred vendor
Bridesmaid Dresses: Revelry
Cake: Dortoni
Transportation: Sir Oliver

Walk the aisle in style with your gown from Bridal Reflections’ sample sale, featuring gorgeous styles at up to 90% off

For many brides, dress shopping is a major highlight of the wedding planning experience. From exploring new styles to that exhilarating feeling when you’ve discovered “the one,” shopping for your gown is a rite of passage you’ll remember well after you’ve said “I do.”

Let’s face it, though – those beautiful wedding gowns can get very pricey, very quickly. But Brides of Long Island are in luck: BOLI Preferred Vendor Bridal Reflections’ incredible sample sale is on the horizon! From Thursday, November 9th through Saturday, November 11th, you can find the dress of your dreams without blowing your budget.

“We typically do our sample sales at least once a year, sometimes twice,” said Brenna Cicciari, social media manager with Bridal Reflections. “We usually have them in the fall and then the spring because those times fall right after bridal fashion week, so we like to clean out some of our inventory to make room for all of the new styles coming in.”  

That doesn’t mean you won’t see some newer styles on the racks. “We’ll have a pretty good selection this year of brand new gowns, so that’s really exciting,” she added. “We’ll have a whole rack dedicated to them.”

What designers can BOLIs expect to find? “A lot of Eve of Milady, Calla Blanche, Enzoani, even some Allure or Paloma Blanca,” she detailed. “Pretty much every designer that we have currently will be featured.” And don’t forget the finishing touch! The sample sale will include veils, headpieces, and other accessories as well. 

It’s no secret that sample sales can be a budget blessing, but Bridal Reflections takes their offerings to a whole new level. “It depends on the gown, but some of them are up to 90% off,” Brenna described. “Our starting price for gowns is $150, and they’ll primarily be in the $150-$350 range. Some of the newer gowns will go above that.”

Besides finding drastically reduced prices, Brenna outlined some of the major benefits of buying your gown at a sample sale. “You’re basically getting the gown right off the rack,” she explained. “You can take it with you that same day. That’s really great for the girls that decide they want two gowns. They might have bought their first ceremony gown with us in the past, and now they’re deciding as it gets closer to the wedding day that they want a second gown. Gowns are usually made to order, so they can take anywhere from 6 to 10 months to come in. The sample sale is a great way around that.” 

Sample sales are beneficial for brides with shorter timelines, too. “If you’re in a pinch, you’re deciding to get married quickly and you don’t have a full year, finding your dress at a sample sale is a great option.”

Ready to start shopping? Don’t forget to make an appointment – and soon! “Appointments are required, and can be made by calling our salon directly,” said Brenna. “The sale is taking place at our Carle Place location, but we do have gowns from all three stores available. We also have an appointment request submission on our website. The earlier the appointment, the more options you’ll have. So I would urge you to book appointments as soon as possible.” 

 

Bridal Reflections Sample Sale

Thursday, November 9th through Saturday, November 11th

Bridal Reflections Carle Place

80 Westbury Ave, Carle Place, NY 

Call (516) 742-7788 to book your appointment

Or click here 

It’s normal to be nervous, but sometimes it could be something more than that.

Most people get the wedding jitters throughout planning. Perhaps you had a dream about an ex or that something went wrong at the wedding. Maybe your future spouse is annoying you during the stressful parts of wedding planning. Or maybe just the thought of spending the rest of your life with one person is making you a little nervous. This is completely normal! If you are getting cold feet, here are some questions to ask yourself before the big day – to figure out if it is just nerves or something more than that.

Why are you getting married?

This is a big question, but it’s an important one. And it’s really an open ended one. Are you getting married because it’s what is expected of you? Because it’s something you’ve always dreamed of? Or is it because you love your significant other and want to build a life together? Or it could be a plethora of other reasons. But if you’re getting cold feet, you need to do some soul searching to really figure out why you’re getting married.

MORE: How to Talk to Your Fiancé About Couples Counseling 

Is he/she THE ONE?

The dating scene can be tough. From bad dates and dating apps to ghosting, it can get rough. If you’ve been dating for a while, and you find someone you really click with, it can be easy to fall into that “lovey-dovey” relationship phase pretty quickly. And when he or she popped the question, you were excited of course, but might have also noticed feeling relieved that your dating days were over. But it’s important to ask yourself: is this person THE ONE for you? Only you can really answer that question, but again, if your Spidey senses are tingling as your wedding date approaches, it’s a question you probably should answer.

Are you getting married too soon?

Another open-ended question. Often couples think, “am I really ready for marriage” – even long after they’re married! And this is completely normal. Marriage can be tough – and that’s just because life happens. Situations change. Even people change. Once you get engaged, people may begin to notice you more. It might make you wonder if maybe there’s other fish in the sea. The question to answer is: are you really looking for something more, or do you just like the attention? Because at the end of the day, the person you have waiting for you at home gives you the same amount of attention and is ready to do it for the rest of your life.

MORE: What to Expect When Moving in With Your Fiancé

Why are we fighting?

All couples fight. Some even say if you don’t fight, something is wrong. (And if you don’t fight – there IS nothing wrong!) But if you find yourself getting irked or annoyed or constantly getting into tiffs with your significant other, think about why. Most likely, it’s because you’re both super stressed about the wedding. But if you feel the fighting is intense or you can’t resolve it quickly, take into account that it could be something more. You could always talk to a therapist or marriage counselor before the big day if the constant fighting is really bothering you.

Did I feel this way before?

If there were moments or concerns throughout your relationship where you felt this way, either about your partner or the situation, this could be a sign of something more than cold feet. When you’re in love or in a relationship, sometimes we accept certain things about our partner. And most of the time, that’s OK. The dirty clothes on the floor? Not really a reason to get nervous about the big day – just really annoying. But maybe your significant other drinks and it gets out of hand sometimes. Remember, red flags can pop up at any time in your relationship, including your engagement and even after you’re married. It’s best to really assess the situation if your gut is trying to tell you something.

MORE: 20 Self-Care Ideas During Wedding Planning

So what can you do about it? How can you really tell if it’s just pre-wedding jitters or something more? Remember, being engaged and planning a wedding can be stressful, and your emotions run high. If you find yourself overwhelmed or questioning things, take a step back. Put the wedding planning on the back burner and focus on yourself, and the reasons you love your partner. Think about the future you are planning – and the life you are getting ready to build together.

If you’re still nervous or worried, let your partner know. Speak to a therapist or a marriage counselor. Take a mini-vacation to clear your head. Keep doing the things you love that normally relax you – the gym, yoga – anything to take your stress down a peg and warm up those cold feet.

Your decor makes a difference! Here are 10 of the best rental and decor vendors for Long Island weddings

Your venue may be spectacular, but it’s your decor choices that will bring your wedding to life! Whether you want a light and whimsical look or a dark and sophisticated palate, these passionate professionals can bring any vision to life. Here are 10 of the best rental and decor vendors for Long Island weddings.

• MORE: 34 of the Best Long Island Wedding Venues

The Finishing Touch

From their consultation to their personalized design strategies, The Finishing Touch can create a customized motif to fit your individual tastes. Their extensive collection of tablecloths, napkins, chair covers, and and accessories is unrivaled on Long Island.

Artful Biv

Owner Dana Biviano has a passion for helping brides enhance their weddings through special, one-of-a-kind custom pieces of art. She creates an array of personalized and hand-lettered signage including acrylic, mirror, and wooden signs, card boxes, place cards, table numbers, seating charts, signature cocktail signs, and more. 

East Coast Party Co.

It’s not a party without a flower wall! Give your guests an incredible photo backdrop, courtesy of East Coast Party Co. Owner Andrea McCabe was inspired to create custom-made flower walls after creating one for her own baby sprinkle.

Milan Event Experience 

Khadine McMillan, owner of Milan Event Experience, is a professionally trained Event Planner & Event/Balloon Stylist that creates versatile, modern, and luxe balloon decor and event styling. In addition to balloons, they offer backdrops, champagne walls, 360 video booths, treat/flower carts, pedestals, sofas, and more! 

Alpha Lit Long Island

See your (new) last name in lights! Alpha Lit Long Island provides marquee lettering to spell your name, initials, or a variety of words. Their lights make an illuminating addition to your wedding reception, engagement party, bridal shower, even proposals! 

• MORE: See Your Name in Lights, Thanks to Alpha Lit Letters

Long Island Lux Picnic

Long Island Lux picnic specializes in bridal showers, bridesmaid proposals, and engagement celebrations! Every picnic can be customized to your vision, and they also offer backdrops, tablescapes, and other event styling services. 

Sweet Jules Treats

Not only can you get beautiful event styling and accessories from Sweet Jules Treats, you can also get a few delectable desserts as well! They specialize in event planning, full decor set up, flower walls, balloon arrangements, welcome signs, and yes – some “sweet treats” to go along with it.

Pew Bow Rentals

Inspired to start a business after her own daughter’s wedding, Maureen at Pew Bow Rentals will deliver stunning pew bows for your ceremony. They love giving each bride that “wow” factor!

Rose_ArtCreations

Owner Amanda Hernandez specializes in seating charts, mirror guest books, entrance signs, custom table menus, table numbers and and other custom signage. She brings her creative hand and outgoing personality to each piece she makes.

Fiore and More

Understanding that weddings can be incredibly expensive, Fiore and More opened their doors in 2024 to create beautiful backdrops and decor for an affordable price!

• MORE: Plan Your Wedding with Ring Leader

Be prepared for anything on your big day! Here are 51 items to pack in your wedding day emergency kit

Your wedding day will be gorgeous no matter what happens. But, real talk: with all the moving parts, pieces, and people that have to be at the right place at the right time, it’s inevitable that a few things won’t go according to plan. While you can’t prepare for every possibility under the sun (or veil), having a few useful tools on hand could prevent a bigger crisis. Here are 51 items to pack in your wedding day emergency kit.

• MORE: 29 Items to Pack for Your “Night Before the Wedding” Bag

First Aid & Medical Items

1: Bandages (multiple sizes!)

2: Pain relievers (Advil, Tylenol, Motrin, etc.)

3: Allergy medications 

4: Nasal spray (Afrin, etc.)

5: Alcohol swaps

6: Antibiotic ointment

7: Antacids 

8: Any prescription medications for the bride or bridal party

Toiletries & Personal Hygiene Items 

9:  Menstrual products (pads, tampons, extra cups, etc.)

10: Toothpaste

11: Floss

12: Mouthwash  

13: Toothbrush

14: Deodorant

15: Dry shampoo

16: Lip balm

17: Razor

18: Eye drops

19: Spare contacts

20: Glasses

21: Tweezers

22: Nail clippers

23: Nail file

24: Tissues

25: Cotton swabs

26: Breath mints or gum 

27: Perfume 

Hair & Makeup Items

28: Bobby pins

29: Hair elastics

30: Hair clips

31: Lip gloss

32: Hairspray

33: Brush or comb

34: Facial mist

Clothing Items

35: Mini sewing kit (with needles and threads)

36: Safety pins

37: Fashion tape

38: Stain-removing wipes or pens

39: Lint roller

40: Clear nail polish (for hosiery runs)

41: Small scissors

Miscellaneous Items

42: Portable phone chargers 

43: Easy-to-eat snacks

44: Sunscreen 

45: Bug repellent 

46: Spare earring backs 

47: Cough drops

48: Hand sanitizer

49: Baby wipes

50: Glue 

51: Scotch tape 

 

Say your “I do’s” with a BOO! Here are 6 Super Spooky Long Island Wedding Ideas for Halloween 

If you start pulling out your pumpkins and giant lawn skeletons once the calendar flips to September, then Halloween is the perfect time of year to have your wedding! Show your love of all things spooky with these ideas for a Halloween-themed Long Island wedding:

• MORE: 13 Subtle (and Not so Subtle) Ways to Incorporate Halloween into Your Wedding

1. Take festive pictures

We love Halloween on Long Island! There are so many fun things to do and see, and nearly all of them make perfect backdrops for some spooky Halloween wedding pictures. Check out Millridge Inn’s Halloween Village, the Fall Festival at Hicks Nurseries, The Great Jack-o-Lantern Blaze at Old Bethpage Village Restoration, or the Scarecrows in the Old Westbury Gardens!

2. Say your vows in a vineyard at dusk

Long Island’s vineyards are scenic and beautiful, but with some decor touches they can take on a spooky feel – especially as the sun sets! Consider choosing a venue with a vineyard like BOLI Preferred Vendors East Wind Long Island or The Vineyards at Aquebogue for some holiday ambiance.

3. Decorate with some Otto the Ghost memorabilia…

Otto has been a Long Island favorite for decades. In fact, you may remember taking a hayride with him in your elementary school days! Pick up a few Otto figurines and work them into your wedding day decor. 

4. …and add seasonal touches to your decor 

Skeletons, pumpkins, dark-hued florals – there’s a wealth of autumn-inspired objects and decorations you can incorporate into your wedding.

5. Encourage costumes 

Tell your guests to ditch the tuxes (well, unless they’re planning to dress as James Bond) and show up to your wedding in costume. Your pictures will be festively unique with the bride and groom surrounded by princesses, movie villains, and maybe a few ghouls and goblins!

6. Turn a Gold Coast mansion into a haunted house

Long Island’s beautiful Gold Coast mansions are home to some of our areas most stunning wedding venues. The historic architecture of these incredible mansions can provide an incredible setting for a spooky version of your “I do’s”! Check out BOLI Preferred Vendors Westbury Manor, The Mansion at Oyster Bay, Chateau at Coindre Hall, or Bourne Mansion.

• MORE: 8 Trends for 2024 Long Island Weddings

Sometimes brides choose to change into a reception gown or a party dress after a ceremony.

Choosing your wedding gown is a big deal. You may have been dreaming of the perfect gown even before you got engaged. But sometimes, for whatever reason, you change your mind when you’re in the store. You get encouraged to try on a different style and fall in love with it. But that itch in the back of your mind keeps going back to your original look. Well, guess what? There’s no hard and fast rule that says you just need to have ONE wedding gown for your big day! In fact, brides are now choosing to change from a more traditional gown during their ceremony to more of a party dress for their reception. Here are seven reasons why you need a reception gown!

You Just Want to Dance

Let’s face it! Sometimes, those beautiful gowns can be a handful. Whether you have a tight mermaid look, or a princess ball gown, they can get in the way – and you just want to dance! This is the perfect opportunity to debut a more fun, shorter and easier-to-move-in party dress. Because it’s your party and you’ll dance if you want to!

MORE: 6 Things to Wear When Dress Shopping 

You Found the Perfect Gowns

Yes, that’s right – gowns, plural. It happens. You fall in love with one, but you try on a few more just to see and you fall in love with another one! If it’s in your budget, we say splurge and get both – especially if they are completely different styles that fit your personality perfectly!

You Want to Make a Statement

If you’re all about making a statement, this could be the perfect way to make it – a reception gown. Perhaps you want something traditional in white for your ceremony, but white is just not your color. Why not get a second gown for your reception that is colorful or has pops of color that are bound to make a statement?

MORE: 7 wedding gown options that will set you apart 

You Like Shorter Dresses

If long gowns aren’t your thing, but you do want to be traditional for your wedding ceremony, then getting a party dress for your reception is the obvious choice. Something shorter and more your style will be the perfect way to make your entrance.

It’s Hard to Move (But You Love It So Much!)

Some dresses are just so gorgeous you can’t say no when you try it on. But then reality sets in, and you realize that it might be hard to move in or even uncomfortable to be in all night. Getting that reception gown will be key here, so you can move easily throughout the night to mingle with your guests.

MORE: 15 Ways to Save Money on Your Wedding Gown 

You Want More Photo Ops

More dresses, means more photo ops! Heck, you might even want your future spouse to change it up too! This will leave you with more fun memories to look back on.

You Just Really Love Dresses

Or maybe you just really, really love dresses. This is your opportunity to splurge and showcase two beautiful dresses for all of your loved ones to enjoy. And the perfect opportunity to just own more dresses!

Still undecided on what kind of gown you might like? Here are some options.

Your “big” day doesn’t necessarily require a “big” party. Here’s how to make a small wedding guest list.

Every bride’s ideal wedding day looks different – some want a big, blowout party with everyone they’ve ever met in attendance, and some want a small, more intimate gathering with a handful of close family and friends (PS: whatever your preference, your wedding is going to be beautiful).

But if your picture perfect day is “small and more intimate” rather than a “big, blowout party,” you might run into a few snags while putting together the guest list. Who makes the cut? What number even counts as “small,” anyway? Before you order those invites, here are some tips on making a small wedding guest list.

• MORE: The Best Parts of Planning Your Wedding, According to Real Brides of Long Island

Talk it out

As with everything wedding-related (or life-related), communication is vitally important. Sit down with your fiancé and make sure you’re on the same page. Confirm that your ideas of “small” match – small may mean 20 people to you, but 120 people to them.  

After you’ve put some preliminary numbers in place, start making a list of the people you absolutely want in attendance. This could include only family members, mostly close friends, or a combination of the two. If this list is bigger than the number you originally had in mind, consider budging on your limit. If it’s a lot bigger, go back to your list and decide where to make some cuts. Keep in mind that you WILL get declines – even from people you don’t expect. 

You might also want to discuss your small guest list with parents (especially if they’re footing most of the bill). While your wedding is YOUR day and YOU get to call the shots, your parents may have a few people they’d like to invite. The key words here are “a few” – if their list is longer than yours, remember to communicate your wishes for a limited guest count. 

Make a B List

Once you’ve nailed down your “must-haves,” put together another list of friends and family that you’d invite if you were considering a bigger wedding. Again – you will likely get declines (even with a shorter invite list), so having a few more names as a backup is a good idea. Don’t forget to order a few extra invitations for this purpose!

Let everyone know

Sure, getting a wedding invite in the mail is always an honor. But as wedding trends change (and as they get more and more expensive), people have begun to realize that being excluded from your guest list isn’t the biggest offense in the world – remember when Covid restrictions forced brides to UN-INVITE guests to their weddings?

If a lot of people in your life are already married, they’ll probably remember that planning a wedding is a huge undertaking and understand your desire to keep things small. There are obviously exceptions to this sometimes, and every family member, friend, and situation is different, but for the most part your loved ones should accept your decision without any drama.

When discussing your wedding with friends and family who aren’t on your guest list, explain your plans for a limited and more intimate gathering. You can even include this information on a wedding website or in a social media post. If you’re upfront and honest about your smaller wedding, your friends and family won’t be so surprised when their mailbox is empty.

• MORE: How Do You Address Your Wedding Invitations? Here are All the Ways

 

Consider a destination wedding

Destination weddings usually have an inherently smaller guest count, just because most people can’t commit to traveling. If narrowing down your invite list has become complicated and fraught, consider saying your vows somewhere away from home. Even if you’ve got a bigger list than you’ve planned, it’s likely that the vast majority of those you’ve included will decline. 

• MORE: 7 Reasons to Have a Destination Wedding

Make your wedding virtual

Most of us have become very comfortable using video conferencing services like Zoom and Google Meet over the last few years. If you’d like to share your ceremony with a larger audience than you can invite, consider live-streaming your “I do’s” so friends and family can be there virtually. 

In Brides of Long Island’s Monthly “Mrs.” series, we profile some of our members’ unforgettable weddings. This month, Jackie Carr discusses how she found the perfect venue that not only matched her theme, but also had the full package.

When Jackie and Evan Carr got engaged in early 2020, Jackie says she wanted to get married sooner rather than later, but the world had other plans. However, she says giving herself two years was the perfect way to plan her wedding.

A Sweet Proposal

Jackie and Evan ran in the same circle of friends in high school, despite attending different schools. At some point, they both found themselves single and they hit it off in 2017. After three years of dating, Evan proposed. Jackie explains that he wanted to propose at one of their first date spots, but the park was closed. “He improvised, so we headed to a different park. It started snowing with some of the biggest flakes I’ve ever seen,” she says. “We stayed in the car, where he proposed. It was so sweet and intimate.”

Finding the Perfect Package in a Pandemic

Jackie says once they got engaged, she wanted to hit the ground running with planning. But as the pandemic started shutting things down, she wasn’t able to tour any venues. “I think we finally met with Three Village Inn in November of 2020,” she says. “We were just thrilled that we could finally visit a venue in person!”

She did check out some other venues that were allowing tours, but when she walked into Three Village Inn, a BOLI Preferred Vendor, she knew it was the perfect venue to make her vision of a rustic wedding come to life. “Once we saw the garden for the outdoor ceremony space, and the exposed wood inside, it was the best of both worlds for us!” And it was a bonus that it is a Lessing’s venue that offers a package, which was very important to Jackie and Evan. “We knew that a package was what we wanted, as it is more affordable, and less time consuming, since the vendors are included.”

Included in the vendor package at Three Village Inn were Park Ave Studio, a BOLI Preferred Vendor, and LI Sound DJ, a BOLI Preferred Vendor. Jackie says photography was the most important vendor to her, besides the venue. “I take photos professionally. If I could have taken my own photos at my wedding, I would have!” She says she explained this to Park Avenue, and they were amazing! “Five different people actually called me the day before our wedding to make sure everything was perfect for me! They were really on top of everything.”

MORE: What is a wedding content creator? 

A Rustic Vampire Wedding to Remember

They chose Oct. 8, 2022 – which gave them two years to put together the personal touches to create the perfect ‘rustic vampire’ wedding. Jackie explains that they came up with that theme because she wears black every day. “This was the one day of my life where I was going to be wearing all white,” she says. “We’re pretty alternative people in our day to day lives. So, it was important to add some of those touches on our wedding day.”

They added jewel tones in their colors, and had black lanterns as centerpieces – centerpieces that a fellow BOLI gave her during planning! Adding to the rustic vampire theme – which really is a joke, she says – was a welcome sign that was designed with bat wings and a coffin! “It tied into our exact theme. It was amazing.”

Some other fun personal touches? Champagne flutes that were metal dragons, and her favorite, a custom wax seal that she used on their menus with some extra dried flowers. And of course, the guest of honor Hunter! “He’s a little skeleton Halloween decoration from my parents’ house that we named Hunter,” she explains. “We used to leave him up throughout the year, and would buy different outfits for him.” Hunter sat next to the card box in his best wedding attire. “It was a silly thing, but Hunter was a total hit at the wedding.”

MORE: 13 Subtle (and Not So Subtle) Ways to Incorporate Halloween into Your Wedding

“They’re Just Really Good”

One of her favorite moments of the day was right before she walked down the aisle with her father. “My dad and I have a great relationship, we’re just big goofballs,” Jackie says. “As we were getting ready to go down the aisle, the sun was setting perfectly, and the leaves were blowing. He turns to me and says, ‘Who did you pay to do that?’ and I just said, ‘I don’t know, they’re just really good here.’”

And that joking statement actually rings true for all of Jackie’s vendors. From the day of coordinator, Winnie, at Three Village Inn to the photographers and the DJ, everyone just went above and beyond the whole time, Jackie says. “Our DJ kept us on the dance floor literally the entire night!” she says. “And it felt like I knew Winnie my whole life!”

Her perfect vendor experience started way before her wedding day though. Jackie got her beautiful gown from North Fork Bridal Shoppe, a BOLI Preferred Vendor. “They were so kind to me, and their VIB experience was perfect, because I travel with a large entourage,” she says. “I was sad that the dress shopping was over after I said yes to my dress.”

Everything Falls Into Place

Jackie believes it does take a village to plan a wedding sometimes. And that’s OK. She wants other BOLIs to know that in the end, everything will fall into place and it’s going to be perfect. “This may go wrong, but it doesn’t matter. All that matters is you’re marrying your best friend.” She also urges BOLIs to take that extra moment or two throughout the day to look around at all of the love in the room. “Take it in and don’t sweat the small stuff.”

MORE: Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff

Vendors:
Venue: Three Village Inn, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
Photographer: Park Ave Studio, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
DJ: Long Island Sound DJ, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
Florist: Village Florist; Sola Woods Flowers
Hair: Stacy at Entourage Salon
Makeup: @jaimeebeyermua
Dress: North Fork Bridal Shoppe, a BOLI Preferred Vendor
Bridesmaid Dresses: David’s Bridal
Cake: Rolling Pin
Tuxedos: Men’s Wearhouse
Honeymoon Transportation: Mark of Elegance, a BOLI Preferred Vendor